Crimson Roses
by Rebelchickie
Summary: I would show them. I would make something of myself. I would rise above all the harsh looks, the bitter words and the hatred that they aimed toward me. I would take it all and shove it back in their face. They would see... They would see that I was stronger then they knew. Stronger than anyone knew. Gone was Mikan the Weakling, now I was Alice of Hell. The Queen of Hell.
1. Chapter 1-The Garden Of Roses

Mikan's P.O.V

I sat there, covered in an absolute, cold sweat from head to toe. My blankets where tangled around my legs so I kicked them off before I curled them to my chest and wrapped my arms around them. My stomach was churning so badly that I swore I would get sick at any moment. The world was so dizzy around me. I couldn't think straight. My breath was coming in frantic puffs.

I swore I was going to die.

'**Good, healthy air flowing in, bad contaminated air flowing out.'**

I focused on trying to get my breathing pattern back to normal. Taking deep breaths in and letting slow breaths out. I just did that for a few minutes, until I was no longer hyperventilating. Slowly, my muscles started to yet again relax. The world came into focus.

Finally, the panic attack was over.

I glanced at the clock on my nightstand and saw it only read 3:38 AM. There was no way I was going to get back to sleep. Shakily, I stood, and grabbed a light jacket before padding barefoot down the halls.

When I reach the outside, I took a shaky breath in. It was a perfect night, and I was such a messed up girl. I felt as if I was contaminating the air around me.

'**Think positive thoughts. Don't let the negative thoughts pull you down. Take a walk after it has passed and tell yourself good things. That should help you. Oh, and Mikan, I you ever have one of those that's not triggered by being kidnapped, or almost losing a friend, come to my office, ill help you through it.' **

I had been told that after Natsume had been kidnapped and Sumire and I had went to save him. I had woken up one night and had an awful panic attack. The nurse told me all theses things to do. Well, she also told me to come back if they ever happened again, but I didn't do that… If you couldn't tell.

I don't know how far I walked, or where I was, but I knew that I was in the Northern wood, home of Mr. Bear. I just continued walking until I heard the sound of running water. I followed it until I reached a black, wrought iron gate. It was locked, so I ended up climbing the tall gate and landing harshly on the ground below with an 'UMPH.'

After making sure no bones were broken, I continued to follow the sound until I found a lake. I could hear the water lapping up around the shore, gently kissing the soft sand. When the beach ended, the garden began, and the ground was covered in rose bushes, and flowers.

Its was practically an enchanted garden. My mouth went into a small, 'O' as I took in my surroundings. It was so peaceful, so beautiful, and so pure. It was original and real. It didn't lie.

That was the beauty of nature.

Humans can lie and deceive and fake everything and anything, but nature tells the truth.

Nature will always be better then humans.

I sat on the beach, my nightdress pooled around my waist so my legs and feet could be in the luke warm water. Tears gently fell down my face as I looked at all the beauty around me. Why couldn't I just die right here and now? I would never again put on a fake smile and pretend that everything was alright. It wasn't, and I don't think it ever could be again.

I hid my issues, my sudden attacks, my true feelings away from everyone.

Because I knew what they said about me when I wasn't there. What they really thought of me. I knew it all.

I wasn't as stupid as they showed my as. As I showed myself as.

I wish that I could just sit here, basking in the calmness of night. The water gently kissing my legs, and the moon making my eyes look like the stars above. I wish that I could be taken away to a better place. I wish to love and be loved. Because wishing is all I have left.

…

Hotaru's P.O.V

I wake up in my soft, comfortable bed, and begin my venture to get ready for another ordinary day of school. After im dressed, I go downstairs and get my breakfast, gliding gracefully over to the table where all my friends sit.

" 'Morning Hotaru-san," chirps Koko happily.

"Good morning, Imai-san," says Ruka shyly.

I hear a chorus of good mornings from Anna and Nonoko and Misaki and Sumire.

Tsubasa flashes me a grin and continues playing his video game. Natsume just continues eating without acknowledging anyone. Just a regular morning.

We eat our breakfast in peace, a rare occasion indeed, considering Mikan's usual annoying begs for food. Speaking of Mikan, where is she?

Oh, well, its not like I really care anyway.

We all head to class and sit there talking amongst ourselves until narumi comes dancing into the room.

"Hello beautiful students, you all look adorable today!" he says as he scans the crowd.

"Oh, where's Mikan-Chan?" he asks. We all shrug our shoulders. What are we, her babysitters? I mean, I might sound cold, but you don't know what it is like having to take care of her. She is like a puppy, or a baby, all she can do by herself is go to the bathroom and smile at you. You have to do the rest for her.

"Probably late," I say nonchalantly. Im not worried, for all I care she can sleep all day.

He nods and dances out of the classroom after yelling "FREE PEROID!"

I sit at my seat while all my friends around me talk (excluding Natsume of course). It is hard to believe that there was a time when Mikan and I where good friends. Before I was whisked off to this school and we both lived in that small town.

What a joke.

I didn't expect to ever see her again. I got her letters, about how she missed me and all her complaints, and I knew I could have written back, but I didn't. She needed to grow up. Now, you can imagine my surprise when she shows up, out of no where, claiming that she came to be with me.

I was furious.

It was like I had to do free babysitting. I tried to ignore her, insulting her to no end, but she never went away. She just assumed I was kidding around. Well, I wasn't.

The others feel the same exact way. They think she is irritating and annoying. They think that the only good thing she has done was saving Natsume from Rio not to long ago.

That's the first time she had proved useful.

I just wish that she would grow up.

Im just so sick of babysitting.

…

Mikan's P.O.V

I didn't realize I fell asleep, but I must have, because I woke up to the sun streaming through the tree tops. I was still on the sandy beach, in that garden. It still looked so magical.

"Huh, is that a trespasser, I see?" says a evil voice as a figure walks out of the shadows.

I stand up as fast as I can and back up a few steps. As if he came from the shadows, Persona casually strolled towards me.

"Do you like my garden?" he asked coolly, picking up a rose and watching it die from his touch.

"I didn't know it was yours, ill just lea-" I said before he cut me off.

"I see that you do. It is very beautiful, isn't it. Almost as beautiful as you," he says as he walks toward me. I back up until im against a tree and he puts a finger under my chin, dark brown splotches appearing on the side of my cheek until they fade away, leaving an Alice stone in my hand.

He rests his forehead against mine.

"Such a lonely girl. Friends that mock her every move. An Alice that is kept hidden. Tears that she so desperately tries to hide. I know what you are going through. And I can make it all better. Just take my hand," he says as he backs away.

He holds out his hand to me, fingers long and spidery, and most covered in rings. He can… make it all go away? No more tears. No more pretending. No more hiding. Before I knew what I was doing, I had reached my hand out, and placed my soft hand, in his calloused one.

The second our hands touched, I felt a burning inside my chest and it slowly inched its way upward, across my shoulders and to the middle of my neck. I could feel my skin being burned away, and smell sizzling flesh. I fell to my knees, in to much pain to even scream. It slowly subsided and I pulled down the neckline of my dress to see what had caused me so much pain.

Right been my chest, was a heart. It was curvy, elegant and had cracks down the center of it. From my shoulder to my other one, I had a words, in fancy cursive writing.

_**And so, dear Alice fell down the hole and was consumed by darkness. There was no Wonderland, but there was Horrorland. Alice soon became one of the monster. She fed off the bitterness and disappointment she knew so well. She became Alice of Hell.**_

Is what it read. My eyes widened in horror. I couldn't see the one on my neck, so I rushed over to the clear waters edge. It was a thorny rose stem, wrapped around my neck, and a crimson rose on the side.

I had just signed away my soul. Desperately, I looked at Persona, who was staring at me with an intense gaze.

"Meet me here, tomorrow night, and I will take you to your new home. For now, just do what you do best. Pretend, Alice, pretend." he said, as he turned to walk away. Then he turned his head to the side, and snapped. I could feel something sharp dig into my skin and tighten and a thorny rose stem appeared in his hand, that led to my neck.

"And don't you dare try to disobey," he said. Then the stem disappeared as he walked away.

I just sat there, eyes glazed over.

_**Child of darkness **_

_**Stay away**_

_**From the garden of roses**_

_**Where nightmares lay**_

_**Children of hopelessness**_

_**Don't run in the night**_

_**You'll be led to the garden**_

_**Where the nothing is right**_

_**Children of unhappiness**_

_**Stay in your beds**_

_**Nothing can hurt you**_

_**Its all in your heads**_

_**Children, oh, children**_

_**Keep your dreams alive**_

_**Don't go into the garden**_

_**Where the roses thrive**_

Then I simply got up, and walked back to my dorm. Nothing can hurt me anymore. I took a shower, put on a long sleeve shirt, pants, and a scarf to cover everything and lay on my bed. It wasn't long before I drifted off to sleep, dreaming of roses, gardens and darkness.

…

**HELLO! I HOPE YOU LIKED THIS! SHOULD I CONTINUE IT!? HOW SHOULD I CONTINUE IT? COMMENT OR PM ME! I NEED TO KNOW! THANKS FOR EVERYTHING! **


	2. Chapter 2-Behind Her Eyes

Mikan's P.O.V

When I woke up, the sky was a display of color. Red, pink, orange, its almost impossible to describe. It was so beautiful that a child like me felt so worthless. I couldn't bring anyone joy. All I could do was run, cry and screw up.

I laughed bitterly at the truth behind the words.

What good was a girl like me?

I had no use.

"Mikan-Chan, I'm here with your homework!" I hear the peppy voice of my pedogay teacher knocking at my door. I sigh, give the sunset one last look and make sure my scarf is in place. I take a deep breath and put the biggest smile I can manage on my face and open the door.

"Hello, Narumi-Sensei! You look good today!" I say with enthusiasm.

"Oh, thank you! Why weren't you in class today?" he asked, his voice full of concern.

"I was feeling very nauseous, but I think I was just tired, because I slept all day and I feel so much better now!" I say with a smile.

"That's good! If you don't feel good tomorrow, don't push yourself! Better to miss school then make your body weaker. You're a fragile girl, we wouldn't want you to break." he says happily as he plops the load of books in my arms.

"Thank you, have a good night," I say, and we part ways.

Fragile. I am not fragile. I'm not breakable. IM STRONGER THEN THEM. I grew up with my grandfather who demanded perfection. My mother is dead. My father is dead. I have no friends who actually give a shit about me and he calls me fragile.

I might be _**broken**_ but im not _**fragile**_.

If only they all knew what I went through. The struggles. The pain. The rejection and depriving I feel. Then they would get it. It hurts so bad to pretend. Because you wear a smile while you suffer.

That night, I packed everything up. I took the pictures that I had with all of them. The pictures where, for a second, they pretended they liked me. I lit my lighter, and I watched them slowly burn.

Every single one of them.

I had one left. The one we took on Natsume's birthday. He said he hated the card and picture I got him, but I didn't. When I felt alone, I would hold onto that picture, hoping that it could go back to that. It never did, but I would never admit that to myself.

For some reason, I folded that picture and put it in my pocket.

Maybe it was for me, as a memory of what I never had. Or maybe it was because I still had a sliver of hope that maybe they really did like me. That maybe, just maybe, they would miss me while I was gone.

It wouldn't really matter, I wouldn't be around to see how the results ended.

By the time it was time for me to start getting ready, the room was clean and empty, except for my suitcases in the middle of the room. I got dressed in my uniform, and grabbed the homework that Narumi gave me.

I didn't do it. What were they going to do, _**expel me for it?**_

I looked in the mirror, wondering if anyone would notice I was wearing a scarf. In in April. No, I think I would be okay. My eyes wandered up to my face. I had big, brown eyes, flecked with gold, but they were so empty. I had a mouth the color of bubblegum, that was so sick of fake smiling. I had bags under my eyes from exhaustion. I had cheeks, a bit to hollow from stress.

No, I wasn't pretty. If there was any hope for that when at first, it was gone now.

I walked to the classroom, and sat down in my usual seat. I was very early, and that is what I had hoped for. I started writing a letter for Narumi to read to the class.

"Oi, Stupid, where were you yesterday?" asked Hotaru as she smacked my with her gun. I didn't deserve that! She did! She was the blackmailing witch.

"I wasn't feeling very good, so I stayed home." I said, rubbing my cheek where she had hit me.

"I didn't give you permission," she said.

I look up at her for a second. I want to hit her so badly. To just punch her over and over for all the times she has unfairly hit me. But I restrain myself so im not on her level.

"Sorry," I say, feigning apologeticness.

She sit down in the seat in front of me, and begins tinkering with her latest invention.

The classroom fills all the way up, and everyone is laughing and having fun. I continue writing the letter, until finally, when the teacher burst in the door, I am finished.

"Free period!" yells Narumi.

Everyone just continues doing what there doing.

I let my mind wander. I wonder where im going. I wonder if it will be better then here. Will I finally get a chance to be myself?

I let my mind process, for the first time, what Persona had said to me. I was practically his property, my tattoo's proved it. But why claim me? Why did he call me pretty? Why me of all people?

It just didn't make sense.

After class was over, I put the letter on Narumi's desk.

_**To: Narumi-sensei and class (read out loud tomorrow morning! Not any sooner or the surprise will be ruined.**_

_**From: Mikan-Chan**_

There, he wouldn't dare open it if it had anything to do with surprises. He would wait early, a smile on his face as he thought of all the possibilities it could be.

I went through the rest of the day, normally, except for I was just a little bit quieter. I still kept my cheery personality up, and my fake smile on.

I could do this, I didn't have much longer to wait.

Finally, night came. I grabbed my bags, and let my mind lead the way back to the garden. It wasn't long before I was standing at the wrought, iron gate. I opened it, and went inside, right by the lake again. This time, I would be departing from it.

"I see you chose the easy way. Good for you," said Persona. He grabbed my bags and led me away.

We reached a spot where a limo was waiting and he put the bags in the trunk and opened the door up to me. I stepped inside the spacious area and took in my surroundings. Fancy. Very fancy.

Persona got in next to me, and we took off. It was silent, except for the sounds outside and the quiet music humming in the background.

I thought that it would be hard to part from this place. I thought that leaving Gakuen Alice would sadden me, considering I had made it my home. But the farther away I got from it, the less I felt.

And as scary as it was, I didn't care.

I just didn't care anymore.

…

**I LIKE HOW ITS TURNING OUT. LEAVE COMMENTS AND IDEAS! I LOVE THEM! THANKS SO MUCH FOR EVERYTHING! Love you all!**


	3. Chapter 3-The Wish To The Sky

Narumi's P.O.V

I got back from my meeting after my favorite class had left. I hummed as I made my way back to my desk, sat down, and started reading the assignments. It had been to write a love letter to me, and some where just plain mean! Oh, well, I cant fail any of my cute students.

I didn't notice that there was an envelope on the edge of my desk until a stray paper landed on top of it from its proper pile. I put it back in its place, and saw the envelope.

"Ohhh, to me and my pretty students, from Mikan-Chan! it's a surprise, too! I just cant wait!" I said happily. I couldn't wait until tomorrow so I could open it and read it to the class!

I graded the rest of the papers and left. I went back home, and crawled into bed. Im sure tomorrow will be a fun day! I cant wait to see what Mikan has planned for all of us! She is such a sweet girl.

She really has a special place in my heart. Im such a lucky person.

…

Natsume's P.O.V

I tossed and turned all day. All day long, something had been bugging me. What was it, you ask me? Polka Dots was acting strange. She still smiled at everyone and greeted us with her usual happiness. But she was focused on a paper in front of her. She wouldn't let me see it.

While everyone talked, she was quiet. She had a far off look in her eyes.

And every once in a while I saw a flash of pain.

That hurt me. When ever pain or sadness flashed through her delicate features I wanted to wrap her up in my arms and comfort her. And I noticed how often her face would contort with it. When her 'friends' where insulting her.

But what hurt more then anything was the expression she would make when I would do it. I don't know why I did it, she just got so irritating sometimes that I couldn't hold myself back. I would lash out on her without thinking.

She pretended to be okay, like she was naïve about the truth behind her words, but sometimes I swore she knew everything. I knew she knew some things, but I didn't know how much.

Then the last thing that bugged me was that frickin. Scarf.

For some reason it bugged the hell out of me.

Mikan was open and predictable, but that scarf made me feel lie she was hiding something. I didn't like the thought of her hiding something from me. She might not be my girlfriend, but…I cared for her in a way I didn't care for anyone else. She made my heart thump in my chest. She made me flustered. She made me angry.

And im not sure what I would do if she left.

I took out a creased photo from under my pillow. It was the picture she had given me for my birthday, saying it was practically from everyone. No, it was singularly from her. I stared at her, smiling brightly, her arm around my shoulders. She looked so happy.

Not like she did today.

I fell into a deep sleep with the picture clutched in my hand.

The next morning, I woke up to the blaring sound of my alarm clock. I groaned.

For a second, playing hookie popped into my mind. It wouldn't be hard, would it? But I felt my heart pulling me to get up. I got up and got ready and headed to the cafeteria. I ate breakfast and sat with my friends.

Mikan didn't show up.

We walked to class, I expected to look up from her unfinished homework and give me a smile that made my heart race.

But she wasn't there.

We all sat down and waited.

Narumi came dancing into the room, happier then usual (If possible) with a white envelope clutched in his hand.

"Mikan has a surprise for all of us." he sings happily. He scans the room, seeing that she isn't there.

"Must be getting it ready right now!" he yells. He rips the envelope open and starts to read.

'_Dear everyone,_

_Im sure your all wondering what surprise I have in store for you. Whether it's a party, or food, or a trip to town. Well, ill give you 30 seconds to guess what it is._

Narumi paused and everyone screamed out there answer. The feeling in my chest just got worse.

_Wrong. Every single one of you is wrong. I don't even have to be there to tell you that. You want to know what surprises are? There bittersweet. The one that I have for you is very bitter sweet. If anything its leaning on the bitter side. Just depends on who you are._

_You want to know where I am? Well, I don't know. But I can tell you this, im not on Gakuen Alice anymore. Iv transferred away. I don't know where I'm going, but that's okay. Because maybe I wont have to ever put that fake smile on my face and act like everything is okay._

_I don't have the details to where ill be going, or for how long, but I have a feeling that its not just a temporary transfer. I probably wont come back. Ever. That in itself decreases the chance of me ever seeing you again by about 95.3%. There are 6 billion people in the world. How hard is it to avoid a group of about 20 some? _

_I don't mean to sound bitter, and im sorry if I am. I don't mean to be, really, its just how iv grown to be. Honestly, I wish you all the best in the world. You have already seen so many things that you should have, just being in this facility. When you get out, I hope you explore until you have been everywhere you ever dreamed of going._

_There is just one last thing I have to say. I love you. I love you all in different ways. Or at least I tried to. I don't want to be bitter…but its hard. I tried to be all of your friends, but you never accepted me. You never really cared. I might have been irritating, but I was just trying to be happy in the circumstances given to me. If I frowned, I knew that I would bawl. So much pent up baggage._

_I guess I should stop writing now. Hope you live good lives without me. Forget me soon, it will probably be the best thing to do._

_Goodbye forever, _

_Mikan Sakura Yukihara._

_PS- about the whole 'leave with good wishes' I decided to just be a bitch… you all hurt me more then you will ever know. When I said I loved you… I think I might have lied.'_

When Narumi stopped reading, he dropped the letter in horror. He looked like he had just been stabbed in the heart by his facial expression and the way he clutched his chest. He fell into his chair and held his face in his hands.

He couldn't believe it.

She was gone. Not like, be back in a little while gone, but permantly. I could almost hear my heart cracking.

The whole room was dead silent. You could hear a pin drop from miles away. What did you say when she wrote something like that? She was saying that she was gone and technically she hated us all.

That it was all our fault.

What where we supposed to do.

I looked at Ruka who was shaking his head. Anna was looking at her feet. Nonoko was staring out the window. Sumire was doodling in her notebook. Koko was rubbing his head, all the thoughts of others giving him a headache. Hotaru had just paused her tinkering for a second. She was just kind of staring off in space with a weird expression on her face. Then she continued.

Her 'friends' didn't even care.

How sick where they? She was gone! My heart felt like it was being torn from my chest. I felt like my world had been ripped from my hands.

I felt darkness consume me.

All the happy moments we had together. The day I first kissed her at the Christmas party. The day we went through the maze for the Alice festival and we got trapped in that room and found in that awkward position. Then day I saw her face when Reo was going to kill me.

All those good memories.

But then there where all the times I had seen her hurt. I had seen her sad and never done anything. The tears I didn't wipe away. The smile that would falter with every blow she took.

She was gone and she wasn't coming back. Narumi softly cried in the front, and there were some kids who sincerely looked apologetic and sad. But they were exceptions.

I got up, my 'friends' watching me as I walked out. I immediately went to my room and grabbed the picture I kept under my pillow. I tore it, so everyone was gone except for her and me. The other half became ashes on the ground.

With the picture clutched in my hand, I went to OUR Sakura tree and I sat. At a time, she would sit on one side, and me the other, and we would talk. At a time, I would fall asleep on her lap.

But those times where up.

She was gone.

I let a few salt drops fall out of my eyes. Those tears where my regrets. Those tears where shed for her. Like she shed for me.

"Oi, Polka Dots, I don't really know where you are. I don't know if you hate my guts or not, but I'll see you again one day. Or I will die trying." I whisper to the sky. And I feel like maybe, just maybe, she heard.

…

**Pretty angst-y right? Yeah, I know. Well, thanks so much for reading! It makes me happy! Feel free to comment and tell me what you think! I ADORE SUGGESTIONS! Have a good day! Love you all! ****J**


	4. Chapter 4-The New Introduction

Mikan's P.O.V

The car trip all the way to the private airport was completely silent. Persona stared at me with his endless onyx eyes the whole way, barely blinking at all. I just tried to avoid his gaze by staring out the window.

"Mikan. Look at me," said Persona as the car parked in front of airport. I refuse to. He grabs my chin and yanks I was facing him.

"You will act like you are in love with me. We will be partners. You are coming here willingly, aren't you? Its your choice, right?" he asked as he placed his hand on my knee and squeezed as hard as he could. I clenched my teeth, trying not to wince.

I nodded my head and his grip loosened. He got out of the car and held the door open for me. His hand was held towards me, and I knew that I had no choice but to take it. Gracefully, I stepped out of the car, taking his hand and letting him lead me away.

He walked casually through the large building, that had white marble floors, with gray specks. The walls where white, but they bare able to be seen because of the numerous windows. You could see out, but they were completely black from the outside.

All you could hear was the clicking of our shoes.

The farther we walked, the dimmer and dimmer the lights got. The windows got smaller, and eventually they had bars on them. It was once deserted but now, you could see men clad in black with sunglasses and big guns. Without even thinking, I clutched onto Persona.

"Scared, Little girl?" he asked me, chuckling, as he let go of my hand and wrapped it around my waist. It felt unnatural and uncomfortable.

I ignore him, keeping my hands at my side.

"Halt!" says a voice and I jump, my hand going around Persona's waist.

"Why are you here?" the man asks. He is a guard, and he is standing in front of a metal door. Apparently, we need to go through there.

"Im here to take my lovely girlfriend back home to Hell," says Persona casually as he smiles down at me.

"She's just a child. Obviously your lying." spit's the guard. What are we going to do?

"She is 16, im only 18." Persona says casually. I want to scowl at the lie. I might _look _16, but im only 13. Lying bastard.

The guard looked suspicious for a second.

Persona looked down at me with a small smile on his face. "Kiss me," he mumbled, so softly that only I could hear. My eyes widen. No. Absolutely not. I give him a small scowl.

Then I can feel the vines around my neck reanimating and I wince. I get up on my tip toes, putting my arms around his neck and planting a kiss on his lips. He happily kisses back. I want to puke so badly. This wasn't like the kiss I had with Natsume.

Then again, Natsume hated you just like the others. I pull back and give him one of the smiles im know so well for. Beautiful and 100% fake.

The guard sighs and swipes over the card. The door beeps and swings open.

We step through, and I look around to see that we are on top of a roof, right next to the landing pad. The wind wiped my hair around my face, and made my skirt fly up.

Persona takes my hand and we walk toward the landing pad, and we wait for the helicopter to come and take us away.

"I never knew you were such the actress," he says as he smirks down at me.

I look away. All I would have to do is run toward the edge of the building and jump. Then everything would be okay. I could be free. I take a step away from Persona and towards the edge and he yanks me back to his chest, trapping me in his arms.

"NO LET ME OUT. I DON'T WANT TO GO ANYWHERE! I DON'T WANT TO GO WITH YOU!" I scream. All the emotions that I tried so hard to hide for so long come that its like a string snapped. Everything hit like a tsunami.

"You want to go back to Gakuen Alice?" Persona asks quietly, letting me struggle against him.

"NO!" I scream

"Then where do you want to go?" he asks softly.

"I DON'T KNOW!" I yell.

We sound of propellers and I watch with tear streaked as it lands lightly. I fell to my knees, refusing to move, so Persona picks me up and carries me on board. The doors close and he places headphones on me, then himself.

I just sit there, unmoving.

"Mikan, buckle up," he says. I just sniffle.

He picks me up again, and puts me on his lap so im straddling him. Taking the seatbelt in his hand, he buckles it over me.

"I Hate You," I spit at him, clutching onto his shirt.

"Of course you do, baby. This is only the beginning too." he says, chucking to himself.

…

Persona's P.O.V

She falls right asleep on my chest, skin pale with tear steaks. Big eyes closed. Long hair like silk through my fingers.

I don't think that she realizes how many eyes turn towards her when she walks by. She is a beauty queen. Yet, she is completely ignorant about it.

She is ignorant in general.

I will open her eyes. I will show her a world bigger then her anything she ever imagined. She might be scared. She might be absolutely appalled, but that's okay. I will be there for her. I will help her. I will show her that it is absolute wonderful when you look at it the right way.

I will make her see that us monsters aren't so bad. She can be one, too. I will protect her. I will care for her.

I will always be there watching her like I have been for the past 3 years.

Unconsciously, I smile out the window as I stroke my hands through her hip length brown curls. The helicopter is descending. I grip my arms around her tiny waist and wait for the impact. She doesn't even stir.

Here we are, we have finally arrived in Hell.

Mikan sits up, rubbing her eyes. She looks at me, confused, until she remembers where she is and waits patiently for me to unbuckle her. We both get off and he takes in her surroundings. Trees line a black pathway, the forest on both sides looking dark and dangerous. I glance at Mikan, who is just silently taking in her surrounding.

We walk forward and Mikan tries to keep her brave face on. We arrive in front of the academy, never seeing or hearing a Soul.

I take her to the principles office. We open up the grand oak door and step into the Victorian style room. Dark oak furniture, velvets, rich colors, even the brown haired principle that had a shocking color of cappuccino eyes looked straight out of pastel painted picture.

"You must be Mikan Sakura, I have heard so much about you. Now Persona, what 'class' is she in?" the principle says politely to Mikan, then turns his eyes to me.

"Look for yourself," I say.

He reaches out his hand, and hesitantly, Mikan takes it. He yanks her roughly towards him, making her squeal in surprise. He jerks her chin up, reading the words across her chest.

"Your kidding me," he says to me.

"What are you talking to about?" asked Mikan.

He scowled, and turned to her. "There are 4 ability groups. Assassins. Liars. Servants. Leaders. But you see, theses tattoos that are given to you based on these categories. People should always fit in these categories, but there are always exceptions. We like to call these….exceptions' group the Freak Shows. They are the baldest of the bad. Alices so strong that if they were to throw a temper tantrum, it would be considered a national catastrophe. If not worse. And you, my pet, fit into that category." he said to Mikan.

This is when the reality begins.

…

Mikan's P.O.V

"And you, my pet, fit into that category," he sneered at me. My eyes widen. No, it wouldn't be. I wasn't dangerous. I might be a bitter, lonely person, but I wasn't a threat.

"But you could be," he said to me, as if reading my thoughts.

"Never," I whisper.

"Just you wait. Rezabella!" he yells. A girl with black hair and black eyes comes in. she silently comes over and takes my hand. She turns to look at the principle and then when she sees him nod, she pulls me out of the room.

"Where are you taking me?" I ask quietly. She glances back at me and gives me a microscopic smile.

"Just to clean up. That all," she says. I breath a sigh of relief.

"Im Mikan, who are you?" I ask. She looks back at me with an 'Are You Stupid' look that I knew so well. She doesn't answer.

We come to a red door and she unlocks it and takes me inside. It just looks like a beauty parlor…with the color scheme of red and black…

She sits me down in the seat. She yanks off my scarf and gives me a black tank top and black shorts to change into. I sit back down in the seat and let her examine me.

"My name is Rezabella. You name is now Alice." she says as she points to the last sentence on my chest 'tattoo' or what I call 'my brand'.

This place is just….weird.

"Don't go by your original name. Ever. Or you will be punished." she says. She starts brushing my hair, and I close my eyes. She pulls it back into a pony tail and then I hear it.

_**SNIP**_

My eyes snap open, only to see her holding my pony tail in her hand. The hair that I had spent so much time growing was all gone. Now it was just unevenly cut around my face.

I turn to her with my eyes wide and filled with rage.

"Im sorry, I had to." she says. My anger dissolves when I see a look of hopelessness in her gaze. I understand that she didn't want to do it. She had to because of 'him'. The principle treat them like marionette puppets.

She then takes out a piercer, and Alice controllers.

"I have to give you four. That's the bare minimum for our category. You can pick them if you want." she says softly.

My eyes skim her hand and immediately go to bloody red diamonds. They were the exact shade of Natsume's eyes.

I pick those. Then some black studs, Silver crosses, and a tiny hoops to go on the top of my ears.

When she turns me around, I see a scary looking girl. My appearance alone just screams 'Bad Girl.' Maybe I needed to get a personality to match it.

"Alice, its time to take you to meet the rest of your team. Are you ready?" she asks. She meant was I ready to give up every moral I had. Every rule I had ever known was about to be broken. And though she was giving me time, I didn't have a choice.

It was time to grow up.

I needed to give up everything I once knew. I was a new person.

Never again was I going to be stepped on.

No, not anymore. I took out the picture I had of all of them, and tucked it away.

It was time to say goodbye to the Mikan they knew.

"Yeah im ready." I say to her.

Hello, my name is Alice, touch me and your dead.

…

**Long! Hope you like! Thanks so much for reading and if you have any ideas for OC'S then tell me! Any ideas, TELL ME! Thanks so much! I appreciate it!**


	5. Chapter 5-Dimming Light

Rezabella's P.O.V

The first time I saw her, I knew that she was innocent. There was no blood coating her hands. She still had that dim spark in her eyes. She still had hope, even if it was slim.

And all I can do is pray that the spark doesn't disappear.

I walk Alice down the hall, her eyes trained dead straight. She was ready to do this, whether she liked it or not.

She was already in the third step of this place: Acceptance. She had conquered, Realization, Transformation, and Acceptance. Next was Reality Check.

We walked and walked, until we reached a giant red door that was open revealing, black and white striped walls, black and white stairs, and a red ceiling. I casually walked down them, and with only a moments hesitation, she followed.

Deeper and deeper we went into the earth, the silence making it seem so much longer then it was.

But eventually, I heard the familiar yelling, and we reached a white door. Faintly, I smiled as I saw Alice's bewildered expression. When the door opened, her eyes went wide.

There, in the white and black decorated room, where three figures. Two of them where handsome boys, and one of them was a beautiful girl. The boys were wrestling on the floor, screaming profanities like they where regular words, and a girl, screaming at the top of her lungs for them to stop while beating them both with a baseball bat that didn't even seem to faze them.

The second they heard Alice gasp, they where all rigid, guns pointing at her.

"Calm down, guys, she is the new member." I say, with an amused smirk on my face.

They all look at her with wide eyes.

Its not everyday that we get a new member. No, it is extremely rare. The last person who came was me, and that was over five years ago. They all stood up properly and stared at Alice, and she stared right back.

I was the first to break the silence.

"Alright, lets introduce ourselves. My name is Rezabella. My Alice is distortion." I say.

…

Mikan's P.O.V

They were all so beautiful. I first saw them fighting, then pointing guns that practically came out of nowhere at me, then staring at me, all standing in a line before me. I felt like a was a piece of meat, being judged on my quality.

They will probably decide that im useless and just kill me.

Im pretty certain about that.

Rezabella introduced herself, trying to break the awkward silence that had settled around us. You could tell they all lacked social skills.

"My name is Chess, I have the Alice of advance mind reading. Pleasure to meet you." said the now calm girl who just a second ago had been out of control. She had shoulder length lime green hair with deep baby blue eyes. An odd combination, but she rocked it. She was dressed in a short green skirt, with the same color of army green top that had off the shoulder straps. On the top cameo layer of her skirt there was 004 printed in big, white numbers.

"The name is Sebastian, Seb for short, and my Alice is animal transformation." said one of the boys. He had shaggy, dirty blonde hair that had multiple color highlights in it. He had gray eyes that seemed to examine your every step. The was wearing army green pants, a black, muscle shirt, and his army color, jacket lazily left open. On the right side of his jacket, there was 002 printed on with white paint, just like the Chess'.

"Name's Aki, and my Alice is death." said the last boy curtly, his gorgeous yellow eyes seeming to glare into my soul. His red hair was wild and untamed, but you could tell that it was well kept. He was wearing the same outfit as the other boy, but his jacket was buttoned halfway up, and his muscle shirt was white. Plus, he had a silver necklace around his neck. On the bottom left side of his jacket was 001 and on the left side was KING written in that white paint.

"My name is Alice, I am 13 years old. I have the Alice of SEC and nullification." I saw blank, but I give them a half smile when I see them nod there heads in understanding. Well, Rezabella, Seb, and Chess did. Aki just scowled.

"Iv done most of the work, now its someone else's turn." yells Rezabella as she takes off running. Before I can blink, Seb and Chess are gone too. Damnit, am I really that bad?

Must be.

Aki scowls deeper, and mumbles what he thinks is incoherent, but I hear perfectly fine. Hey, I never said I didn't pick up a few Alice's back where I was. I might have been stupid, but I wasn't _**that **_stupid.

They thought differently, but oh, well.

"Why the hell am I stuck with the freaking girl. What the hell did I do wrong? Im the freaking leader of this hell hole, so it aint my freaking responsibility." he says.

"I don't give a damn if you take me or not. Ill find my way, you ass." I spit back at him. He looks totally taken aback for a second. And he stares at me as I walk off.

I wander down the halls, fuming at what that moron said. Well im sorry im here, if he doesn't want me here, he should kill me. I turn, and grab the handle of the closest door. I turn the handle.

WHAM.

There is Aki behind me in seconds, making sure it stays closed.

"Don't. Ever. Go. In. My. Room. Ill show you to your freaking room," he says as he grabs my wrist.

"Don't touch me, you jerk!" I yell, yanking my hand out of his grip. He scowls at me over his shoulder and leads me down the hall at a brisk pace. We reach one of the last doors and he grabs a key out of his pocket, unlocks the door, throws it open, throws the key and starts walking away.

He stops in the middle of the hall way.

"Sorry," he mumbles so silently that only I can hear, and opens his door and shuts it, locking it behind him.

What an odd guy.

I walk into my room to see my suitcase waiting. I fall onto the big black bed and, within seconds, im asleep.

…

Aki's P.O.V

The next week, we train Alice. She is weak, and that isn't a choice if she is going to stay. All of us get acquainted, and we all get to know her. Me included, though it was against my will.

Turns out, she isn't half so bad.

She is snappy, and wont handle your crap for very long. Always has a witty comeback. And has some sever anger issues. When she goes off, she goes off. Much like all of us here.

Yet, she is somewhat gentle. She can sit down and just sit in silence and read a book with Chess. She can cook. She sometimes acts like a mother. And sometimes, if she's in a good mood you do something to make her happy, she will give you a smile that could put the sun to shame.

There that beautiful.

She became stronger and stronger, and I noticed that the light in her eyes got dimmer and dimmer, but its still there. She still has that tiny strand of hope. And I have a gut feeling that that hope has nothing to do with getting out of this place, its about someone.

Who, I don't know, but its someone. Because I used to have that same look.

She doesn't really like to talk about where she came from. She will immediately close up, if you even try. So there is no use really.

But day by day, hour by hour, I get more and more used to her being here. Hell, I even kind of LIKE her being here. it's a break from the normal.

The missions. Classes. The looks we get. Whispers that they don't know we hear. The rumors that are so accurate it hurts.

Well, the fact that it should hurt but it doesn't.

She is becoming one of us so easily that its scary.

Her heart is locked up, and she is just a walking, talking robot, willing to do whatever she is told and not really caring about her life. And she hasn't even started missions yet.

I find myself worrying for her…

Will she become a monster, like us?

What happened to her, really?

All these questions, and so few answers.

…

Mikan's P.O.V

Training is grueling. Every muscle aches. Ever breathe hurts.

Dying seems like the better option.

Revenge has become my only fuel. I want to get avenge Mikan. I want to avenge my innocence. I want to make them pay for the good side of me dying.

There all more murderers then the people here.

Its been a week since I arrived, and I have adapted. The people here, my team to be exact, are good people. They just do some bad things.

And im going to be just like them soon enough.

I get out of bed, and change into my outfit. It is a army green skirt and shirt like Rezabella and Chess wear, the only diffrence is that my number is 005.

Sighing, I brush my short brown hair. I look so much like my mother. Instead of bothering to do anything with it, I just tuck it behind my piecered ears. Before I look away from the mirror, my eyes find my tattoo and linger there. Its so ugly…but im starting to look at it differently. Its morbidly…beautiful. it's a sigh that im ruined. Im a dying rose myself.

All of us are.

Were all just roses slowly withering in time.

I turn away from the mirror, and go to the living room. When I don't hear the usual clatter of the boys wrestling, I know something is up. I go into the room slowly, and I see two familiar figures sitting on the couch.

"Hello, Darling," says Persona, the principle at his side.

Oh, no.

…

**Thanks so much for reading! Tell me what you think.**


	6. Chapter 6-Red and Orange Beads

Persona's P.O.V

It had been a week since I had dropped off Mikan here, and I hadn't seen her since. My temper was short, and my attention span was limited. I was practically going through withdrawal from not seeing her.

'How silly,' you must be thinking to yourself. 'He has gone longer then that without seeing her.'

Well, truth be told, I haven't. The first time I saw her, so long ago it was, I fell _**mad**_ly in love with her. Long, billowing, chestnut curls, so daintily put up in childish pigtails. Big, curious, and naïve, brown eyes, with hints of gold that took in her surrounding with amazement shining so brightly. A tiny, button nose. Red, curvy lips that are perfectly plump, and delectably kissable. I knew I had to have her.

I walked down the empty hall with a scowl on my face.

When I came to the principle's office, I didn't even bother to knock. Why would I do that? He was my brother.

"Ah, Hello, dear younger brother! What brings you here?" he asks cheerfully, resting his chin on his fisted hands.

"I need to see Alice." I say simply, trying to hide the desperation in my voice.

He examines me carefully.

"Fine," he says nonchalantly.

I was absolutely shocked. My older brother was always one to, figuratively, 'beat around the bush.' Usually, he would tease and torment me, making me want to jump over his desk and strangle him. For him to agree, right away for that matter, was something I didn't even know was possible!

"I must go with you, though. I have some important matters to tell them." he says.

There is the catch. I sighed, but none the less, nodded my head.

We walked down the halls in silence. When we arrived, we heard screaming and things breaking. I was very worried that maybe Alice was being harmed, tortured, or abused in some ways, but my brother just smirked at me.

He pulled out a key, and opened the door, only to be met by the clicking sound of guns and shiny pistols being pointed at us. Nii-san didn't even seen fazed, though that wasn't unusual.

When they all saw who we were, they put there guns away and lined up, silent and serious.

"Please, sit down," says the girl who I saw first, Rezabella I think her name was.

We both sat on the couch, and they took seats across from us.

"What do you need?" asks a boy in a sharp voice.

"Now, now, Aki, don't use that tone unless you want me to put that shock collar back on you." he said in a cheerfully threatening voice.

Aki immediately became quiet.

"Do you need anything, Sir?" asked the other girl, in a very polite voice.

"Chess, why don't you go get some tea, we just need to wait for Alice to wake up," says the principle in his cheerful voice. Chess nods her head and goes to do what he says.

"She will be out in a second." say one of the boys in a soft voice.

"Oh?" asks my brother. The boy nods.

Then, we heard footsteps. I eagerly looked towards the door. It opened, and what I saw shocked me.

She looked…different.

I was so used to seeing Mikan look the same. When she arrived, she looked a certain way, and even as time passed, she didn't majorly change. She just grew. But she looked so…different. So deadly. And that was absolutely sexy as hell.

She looked at me and my brother sitting on the couch and her eyes widened slightly.

"Hello, Darling," I say as I stand up and walk over to her. I wrap my arms around her and bend down and kiss her. She doesn't respond. Growling, I bite her bottom lip, warning her, and she responds to my kiss. I hum with happiness into her soft lips. We part and I move a strand of hair behind her ear.

She just had this bland look in her eyes.

I sit down, leading her with me and making her sit on my lap.

Time to get down to business.

…

Natsume's P.O.V

This past week had been absolutely miserable. Everyone lives their lives normally, almost forgetting that she was gone. And that they where one of the reasons she was. But there where things different.

Instead of a free period, Narumi actually taught us.

Every morning we would find him at his desk, dressed in normal clothes. He would acknowledge us with a quiet word or two. Then he would give us our lesson dully. When he gave us work time, sometimes you would catch him staring at the empty spot next to me. I never thought I would feel sorry for him, but I found myself relating to him.

He loved Mikan as a family member. He thought of her as his own flesh and blood and acknowledged her knowing that they could heal each other in ways that modern medicine couldn't. The could replace the gaping holes in their hearts.

Mikan's from never having parents.

Narumi's from never having a loving family.

But we didn't talk about it. In fact, I talked as little as humanly possible. Ruka would try on a daily basis to get me to talk, but I didn't want to talk to him. I didn't want to talk to any of them.

I know that I was at fault along with them, more so then them, but they didn't seem to feel any amount of remorse. They where acting weird, but not sorry for their actions.

"Natsume, please talk to me," Ruka begged, interrupting me from watching Sakura petals blow in the breeze from under our tree.

I stare into his blue eyes.

"What do you want?" I ask quietly, closing my eyes.

"We need to talk about Mikan. You cant blame yourself," he says.

My eyes snap open. Cant blame myself, huh.

"Watch me," I spit at him.

"She wouldn't want you to be u-" he starts, but I cut him off.

"How would you know what she wants? She is gone. We absolutely tormented her, and she left. Go ahead and pat yourself on the back. Your goal is accomplished. The inconvience of her breathing is no longer your concern. She hates us. She hates me, Ruka, you want to know how that feels? It feels like someone has ripped your heart out and replaced it with a burning coal. I lost the girl I loved, because I was a coward. Try telling me that I cant blame myself. I do, and I don't think I should be the only one to." I spit at him, venom dripping from my voice.

I had stunned him to silence.

I closed my eyes again, taking a deep breath of the sweet smell of the Sakura flowers. Mikan always smelled like them. She always sat under this tree, and she always had these flowers in her room. She smelled of sweet vanilla and Sakura flowers.

That scent grew to be one of my favorites. I think it always will be.

Lost in thought, I barely heard Ruka walk away.

I wonder if I will ever be able to feel whole again. If that gaping whole in my chest will ever be filled, or if I will always just live my life feeling empty inside. I wonder if Mikan feels the same way.

But the biggest thing that I wonder is how I could let her go? How did I let this happen? I don't think I would ever understand why I was so stupid. I guess the fact that for once in my life, I felt that there was hope scared me. I was so used to just ignoring and hiding, that when my emotions came forward, I lashed out with the one I felt most. Anger.

She was my personal, verbal, punching bag. And what was so disgusting on my part, was that I insulted her, while she smiled. Sometimes she took it while smiling with tears running down her cheeks. And I didn't care.

How! Why! I just don't get it!

Why was I such an awful person? Why did she leave me? Did she not know how important she was to me? How she saved my life literally and figuratively?

Did she realize how much I loved her?

Because I would always love her.

I watched as Sakura petals floated with the wind, and fell to the ground where they would wither and die. If they where lucky, they would just wither away and go back into the Earth. Most of the time they will be stepped on and dirtied. It was a lot like us.

I stood up, and took out my pocket knife, turning towards the tree. I stabbed the knife into the wood, dragging it down and repeating. NXM I carved into the wood. We would always be here, in the place that we had the most positive memories. She would always be here, even when there was a chance that she would never step foot in the gates of this academy again.

I clenched my fist and ran towards into the forest, running and running and running until my lungs burned and I couldn't run anymore. I bent over, resting my hands on my knees, trying to catch my breath.

Then I looked up.

There I saw, a wrought iron, black gate. My eyes immediately widened. It wasn't the fact that there was a random gate in the middle of the forest, or the fact that I could see a garden inside it. It was hanging from on of the points at the top.

There was a beaded bracelet. It had a pattern of red and orange beads. It was Mikan's birthday last year. She had been in this garden, and from the creepiness of it, I guessed that something not-so-innocent happened here. Maybe it had something to do with Mikan's sudden transfer. Maybe it wasn't just all of us.

I think that this garden would give me a clue.

I climbed the fence, and grabbed Mikan's bracelet, putting it on my wrist and thanking myself for not getting a girly bracelet. I jumped down, and looked around me.

So this is the legendary Garden of Roses.

Just like in the stories.

…

**I am so sorry that I made all of you wait so long! I had finals, and I knew that it was impossible to stay up late and update. I knew it was either I study, and get good grades so im not grounded, or update and get grounded and not be able to update for a while. So it kind of sucks both ways. Well, I actually kind of liked this chapter! Thanks so much for reading! Reviews motivate me and warm my heart, even if it is how I can change. Always love to hear what you think and how you think the story could go. I LOVE HEARING IDEAS, THEY INSPIRE AND HELP ME WITH MY WRITING.**


	7. Chapter 7-Her Crazy Love

**Time to give you a history lesson! This is some back ground on the Garden of Roses!**

…

_Once upon a time, when Gakuen Alice had just opened, and the school got news students daily, there was a girl. Now, this might seem cliché, but I will tell you, this was no normal girl. _

_This girl, with long, golden curls that curtained her back, had a deadly Alice. She could make flowers grow, she could make gardens bloom. She could make the earth swallow you whole without a sound or so much as a flick of the wrist._

_This girl, who's lovely pink eyes sparkled with mischief, was quiet a weapon, but she played it innocent, and no one knew the true extent of her powers. Not even her father, which is quite stupid considering he was the headmaster. Either he was soft in the head, or she was that good._

_The school grew, and prospered, and she made a grand forest bloom all across the academy. Not only was it used to hide the school, but it was also her playground. It was the only place she truly loved to be. _

_She felt as if she where just a plant herself._

_One day, while the girl sat in class, staring longingly at the forest from her window view, she heard a voice._

"_Yamuto, Yuki, please raise your hand," said the teacher, snapping Yuki out of her trance. There stood a boy, not just any boy, but a very beautiful boy. He had shaggy red hair, and the most beautiful orange eyes. His orange colored eyes stared into her pink ones._

_It was love at first sight._

_For Yuki, that is._

_The boy sat next to her, and zoned off as she talked. You see, he wasn't really that interested in her, but he wasn't going to tell her that. But contraire to his first belief, he found himself tuning into her daily talks, and even answering some of her questions. Without knowing it, the girl slowly made him open up, showing everyone the easygoing boy he was._

_That was the boy Yuki loved. And he learned to love her back, just not quite in the same way._

"_I love you, Kaito!" Yuki confessed one day, her usually neutral face, red._

_Kaito smiled, and put his hand on her cheek._

"_I love you, too," he confessed. _

_They soon became the perfect couple. They dated all through high school, and it was the final month of their senior year. Yuki was sure that Kaito was going to propose to her. He hadn't hinted of anything, but she was just so sure._

_She had skipped class, her least favorite, History class, so she could give Kaito the treats she made in Home Economics. They were his favorite._

_She searched and searched, in all the regular places, but she couldn't find him._

"_I promise you, when we get out of here, we will get married," she heard the voice of Kaito, from behind a building. Yuki peaked her head out, watching them. There was Kaito, with her best friend, Ayami._

"_What about Yuki?" Ayami asked, her short black hair getting in her eyes. Kaito tucked the hair behind her ear. _

"_Oh, ill just dump her. Tell her that I just think that it would be best that we split, so we can both live out our dreams. I don't really love her, and I don't think I ever did. It was you. It was always you." he said, chuckling lightly._

"_Never her?" Ayami asked._

"_Of course not. She is just to weird. Yeah, she is good as a friend, but not a girlfriend. Let alone a wife. She is absolutely obsessed with that forest. It really creeps me out." says Kaito. They both laughed and kissed, both acting like what they where doing was wrong._

_Everything. Everything that Yuki had done. Everything that she knew. Everything that she was told. It was all a lie. She stepped out from behind the wall, the clicking of her shoes making both Kaito and Ayami turn toward her. They both stared at her wide eyed._

"_Yuki… I can explain," Kaito said, stepping away from Ayami._

"_He, He, He, He, He, He, He, He," said Yuki, her smile wide and crazy. _

_That had been the last straw. She wont be stepped on and ignored any more. The only thing she ever loved, was just a liar. He didn't love her. No one did. There was nothing that she could do about it. _

_But kill them, that is._

_The earth began to quake and before Kaito could say a word, Ayami had been swallowed by the ground beneath her feet._

_Kaito stared at her with horror. _

"_What have you done! Are you freaking crazy?" he screamed._

" '_Only for you, Baby,'" she said with a fanatical chuckle. _

_She made rose stems wrap around his wrists, and she skipped into the forest, dragging him behind her. _

_Oh, he tried to scream and struggle, but she had wrapped vines around his mouth, shutting him up. She led him deep in the woods, and showed him her 'project.' It was a garden. A garden that she had worked years on. It was filled to the brim with roses of ever color. With ever type of flower. Every type of plant, as long as it was beautiful. They all framed a lake, that had clear waters that where crisp and sparkling. _

_And it was all framed by a black, wrought iron fence._

_The garden was beautiful, but there was only one thing missing. There was a big, blank spot, right in the center of the garden. Oh, how many nights Yuki would toss and turn, trying to think of something to put there. She had roses on the side, so that wouldn't do. Iris's would look silly. Lilies to light. Marigold to short._

_Nothing would go there!_

_But now, oh, now she knew. Somewhere, deep down inside of her, she knew what had to go there. A tree. A large, grant tree. Not just any tree, but a Sakura tree. It would bloom different color petals, based no the emotions of the owner._

_She could do that, but she needed a great deal of power. She dragged Kaito over there, and stood there, her arms wrapped around Kaito, who was still desperately trying to escape. She undid the vines around his mouth._

"_Im sorry, Yuki, ill stay with you. It will never happen again. We will get out of here, and get married. Have the perfect life. Don't do this, baby." he begged for his life._

"_Kaito, Dear Kaito, I cant do that and you know it. You know of my garden, and that simply wont do. I need assurance that you wont ever leave me." Yuki said calmly, running her hands through his red hair lovingly._

"_I promise!" he cried._

"_Coming from the lips of a liar, that isn't much. We will be together forever, whether you want to be or not," Yuki said happily._

"_Please, don't do this," he gave his final plea before light consumed them both. Slowly, they where wrapped in a tree, the most beautiful, and darkest, and most alluring tree ever to be born. It had a twisted black trunk, and branches that stemmed out. The petals falling to the ground where crimson red, signifying the love that Yuki had for Kaito. _

_The twisted love._

_Ever poor Soul ever to stumble across the garden, is to be sacrificed to keep Yuki and Kaito's power alive. Ever year, in the first week of May, the tree blossoms, showing the emotions of the 'guardian' of the garden. The tender, the caretaker, really controls the color. _

_But you would never forget who's it was._

_For carved into the black bark, in curvy letters, is: __**This is the place where Yuki and Kaito lie, lip to lip, hand in hand, and eye to eye. If you destroy there grave, their eternal resting place. The last expression will be horror on your face. **_

_Those words are written in Yuki's handwriting. Her final warning._

_Even in Death she cares and tends her garden._

**Children, oh, children**

**Keep your dreams alive**

**don't go into the garden**

**Where the roses thrive!**

…

_**I hope you liked this! It is the history of how the garden came to be! I hope you liked it. If you have any ideas, feel free to tell me! Thanks so much for reading and I love you all!**_


	8. Chapter 8-On A Mission We Will Go

Mikan's P.O.V

I hated every second that his lips where pressed against mine. It felt wrong and uncomfortable, but I knew that I was going to become a common occurrence. When all of us where back, Chess included, and we all had our tea, the principle started talking.

"Well, as you know, I have given you a very nice break so you could train Alice and get to know her, and I think that you have had enough time. You have a mission tonight," he said.

All of us nodded in agreement, not saying a word to protest on the matter. We knew that it was bound to happen, and that we could never live a mission free life. It was what was expected of us.

"Is that all you needed, sir?" I asked quietly.

"Why no, Alice, it is not. I came to tell you that your friends and your teacher miss you dearly," he said, faking a pout.

My hands clenched together, and Persona started rubbing from my knee to my mid thigh where my hands where folded. As much as I hated to admit it, it soothed me just a little.

"Sir, I mean no disrespect, but if you are going to talk to me, please don't just spout bull shit that you come up with to try to get me angry," I say in a controlled voice.

All my team members look at me with shock.

He smiled. "You are a very smart girl." he said, shocking everyone around him.

"You're right. He never said anything about your friends, but he said he missed you," he said.

"That is because I have no friends," I said in a hard voice, staring at the floor.

_Flashback_

"_Hotaru! We will be friends forever, right?" I ask hopefully._

"_No, of course not," she said. I started bawling, clinging to her like the annoying pest I was at the time._

"_Fine. Yes." she said, trying to get me to shut up._

"_Are you just saying that?" I ask, sniffling. She gives me one of her rare smile._

"_No," she says quietly._

"_We will be friends forever?" I ask._

"_Forever," she agrees. I hold out my pinky hopefully. She gives an almost inaudible chuckle and links her pinky with mine._

_I smile up at her and hug her, and for once, she hugs back._

_Flashback end_

The principle chuckling is what snapped me out of my daydream.

"Their the ones that put you here, whether it was directly or indirectly, so they must be bad," he says happily.

"No, I thank them, they led her to the garden," Persona purrs, putting his head on my shoulder.

The principle chuckled once again.

"Well, I must be going. I wish you well, Freaks. Ta, Ta, for now," says the principle, waving lightly as he walks out of the room. But Persona stays. Everyone empties the room, going to get ready for the mission, leaving the two of us alone.

"Are you happy here?" he asks.

"Well, as happy as I can be, I guess," I say quietly.

"Do you like the people?" he asks.

"Yes, there nice,"

"Romantically?"

"Of course not!" I say, haughtily.

He chuckles.

"Do you miss him?" he asks, his face turning serious.

"Who?" I ask innocently.

"Don't play dumb with me."

"Natsume?" I ask. He nods. For a while I am silent, thinking over his question. It depended on what you meant on the meaning of the word 'missed.'

Yes, I missed him as a person. No, I didn't miss his rudeness and biting insults. No, I didn't miss crying all the time because of him. No, I didn't miss feeling worthless because of him.

"No," I said. Persona chuckled.

"That makes me so happy to hear. You are over him, finally," he says. I nod, not trusting my voice.

"You have to be safe on that mission. Promise me you wont get killed," he said.

"Promise," I say.

"I have to leave for a business trip, and I don't know when I will be back. Stay out of trouble and do what your told," he says. I nod.

"I love you," he says, turning my head and kissing me. I don't close my eyes, but I respond. He breaks away, waiting to hear it back.

"As do I," I say, crossing my fingers behind my back.

"Say it out loud," he demands. He is so frickin bossy. I barely control the urge to roll my eyes and just slap him right across his face to snap him out of his delusion.

The delusion that I am feeding..

"I love you, too," I say.

He gives me one last lingering kiss, before leaving. I go to my room and fall on my bed, asleep.

When I wake up, I see Chess standing at my door, and nod my head, knowing its time to get ready. I put on black, leather shorts with a white belt, a red tube top with Alice in black, and a black jacket over it. I put on my mask with one side black, the other side white and a thick, red zigzag, making it look broken. I tied up my black combat boots and got my pistol.

When I came out, I found everyone already ready, in a multitude of different outfits, the color scheme was black, white, and another color.

"Ready to become a monster," asked Seb.

I smirk at him, and look over at Aki.

"I already am, Seb, this is just the icing on the cake."

…

Natsume's P.O.V

I look around the garden, seeing the beauty. There where plants that I had never even seen before. All so beautiful that it almost seemed like they couldn't possibly be real.

It was hard to believe that some people thought that it was fake.

And the rest where to terrified to ever talk about it.

Weird things happened to those who did. And they where never positive things.

I reached the lake, and I was drawn to the shore. I sat down looking at the calm waters. The relaxation that came over me almost completely distracted me from the real reason I was here.

I stood up, walking around, hoping to find SOMETHING but no matter how hard I looked, or how far around the garden I went, I never found anything. There was no sign that Mikan had been here besides her bracelet that was on the gate.

That wasn't good enough for me. I needed to know what finally drove her to the edge. Who was it that said the last biting remark that made her snap? Because I swear I would find them and make them wish that they had never been born.

'_What if it was you?'_ the question floated into my head.

What if it was ME? What if I was the one?

That is why I needed to find out why she left. I don't think that it was a spur of the moment and I don't think it was her own will. I just need to know. Need to know that she is safe and there is no threat on her life.

"Black Cat, how nice to see you," said a voice behind me.

…

**I know that this is shorter then the norm, but its like 3 in the morning where I am and I have updated like 3 other stories of mine so im a exhausted. Plus, it's a freaking double whammy in cliffhangers. Wow, I think that all of my updated stories are cliffy right now! That is pretty awesome in my book! Well, anyways, thanks so much for reading! It like means the world to me! Im so happy that I have people who like to read what I write. It makes me feel accomplished. Anyways. Leave me a review and tell me what you think! Until next time!1**


	9. Chapter 9-Hello, Murder

Persona's P.O.V

After I left Mikan, I went back to my brother's office and bid him farewell.

"You wont be gone long, will you? Your needed here," he says, demanding like usual.

"No, I just have someone to deal with," I say, a evil smile sneaking across my lips. He nods and waves his hand, shooing me away.

I leave, going to another room down the hall, and opening it. There sit's a scrawny girl, about my age, with long blue hair, puke colored eyes, and a nose to big for her face. Her eyes widened in terror as she sunk lower into her seat.

"I need teleported, and your going to be the one to do it," I say, simply. She nods her head, still shaking, and hold out her trembling hands. I put my hands in hers.

"Imagine where you need to go. Focus on the details of the place. Take a deep breath in and out and imagine my garden, the roses, the lake, and the beautiful Sakura tree. The world got more and more distorted, and I felt myself falling.

When I opened my eyes, I was standing at the edge of the tree line. There was a figure there, a figure I knew well. Silently, I smirked, happy that he had found his way here so I could torment him.

He loved my Mikan and I would rub the fact that he would never have her in his face.

"Black Cat, how nice to see you," I say, walking out from behind the shadows and making him turn around. His eyes are wide, expression on his usual emotionless face.

"Why are you here?" he hissed at me angrily.

"Your in my garden. The question should be, why are YOU here?" I say casually, walking towards him.

"I found her bracelet on the gate. She was in here, wasn't she?" Natsume asked. His eyes showed his eagerness and that tiny sliver of hope.

"Of course she was. She had to leave because of it. Well, that and the fact that she has an Alice that is so deadly that if she had a mere temper tantrum it could kill the whole academy," I say, nonchalantly.

"Where is she?" he hisses.

"Oh, she is somewhere far, far away. You want to know a secret, Natsume," I say, my voice full of mystery.

He glares at me.

"She found this very garden the night before she was found. You want to know why she was here? She came here bawling, sitting at the edge of the lake, crying like someone had just stepped on her tiny heart. It was quite sad," I say.

"Crying?" he said, his voice almost cracking.

"Bawling. She said she wanted to leave this place. She says now that she doesn't regret it. Not at all. She would rather be a monster then a fake. You want to know how she got that way? Because of you. All of you ruined her. That innocent little girl is dead," I say.

The look on his face was priceless.

It was a mixture of pure agony and utter torture. There was a nice satisfying feeling in me knowing I was the one that did that to him.

"Tell her im sorry," Natsume begged. I shake my head.

"Oh, Natsume, its useless, the damage is done." I say. I know that I have done my 'business,' and its time to leave.

"You know that you cant tell anyone about this place. Well, you can, I don't really care. Ill make sure to give Mikan a kiss for you," I sneer, my body fading and the sensation of falling overtaking me again.

I land in the same room I was in before, that girl cowering below me.

I walk out of the room.

What a good day.

…

Mikan's P.O.V

I lay in my bed, my mind wide awake. Today, I had done the deed. The last nail had been hammered in the coffin. Today, I became a murderer.

_Flashback_

"_Please, just do it," said a girl. She was probably my age, maybe a little bit older. Her red hair was knotted and tangled. Her brown eyes dead and hollow. _

_Currently, I have my gun pointed to her head._

"_Why do you want to die?" I ask._

_She gives me a hollow laugh. "I killed my parents, and had my baby sister die in my arms because I couldn't control this curse. Do you know what its like to lose everything that was good in your life and have no one to blame but yourself?" she asks me._

_Im silent._

"_If you don't do it, I will," she says._

"_You are going to be okay," I say. I put my hand on her head, and pull the trigger. She drops to the floor, gone._

"_Alice, come on, she is gone and the mission is done. The others have been killed. We have to leave before back up comes," says Chess. _

_I don't move._

_Rezabella comes and grabs my hand, pulling me out of the room._

"_Shit, guards," says Seb. We hear the tromping of boots, and their angry yells._

"_Can you do this? If you cant, then go, but if you can then fight. No freezing up. No stopping. Just fighting." says Aki in a serious voice._

_I nod my head._

_The guards come pouring in, and all of us get ready to fight. We kick, punch, fight, dodge and shoot. Guards go down like dominoes. _

"_Please, I have a family!" begs the last one. He is obviously lying._

_Pupils dilated._

_Hand slowly reaching for a dagger in his boot._

_I end him too._

"_You've done good. Welcome to the life of a murderer," says Aki, putting his arm around my shoulder._

_What have I become?_

_End of Flashback_

What if I hadn't run into that garden that night? Where would I be right now? Would I be lie this?

'It doesn't really matter, does it? Your here, now deal with it,' I hear in my head.

I hear a faint, almost silent knock at my door. Silently, I pad across the floor and open the door. There stand Persona. I move to the side, allowing him access to my room. He flops down on my nice leather couch, kicking his feet up and making himself comfortable.

"Come here," he says, motioning me. I obey, standing in front of the couch. He looks me up and down, slowly, as if taking in every detail. Forcefully, yet still gently, he tugs me down, and I lay in front of him.

It still feels wrong, but at this point, I don't even care.

"How was your mission?" he mumbles into my hair, his hand coming to rest on my waist.

"It was okay, I guess. I mean, as good as killing a person can be," I say.

"Are you going to snap?" says Persona.

I look at him with a blank look.

"No, im already crazy, I don't think I can get any worse." I say. He kisses my forehead, and I know it should be a comforting gesture, but its not. He is forcing an emotion. He is trying to force love.

"Oh, you will get worse, that I know for sure. Just wait a little and you will see. The whole, 'stop feeling' thing messes with your head, but other then that, you don't have anything to worry about," he says.

I don't utter anther word. What is there to say when you know that its bound to be your future?

"Rei, can I ask you a favor?" I ask. He kisses my head.

"Yes, practically anything." he says.

"Can you just stay with me tonight?" I ask. He picks me up, and puts me down on the bed, covering me up before he stripped himself of his shoes and shirt and jewelry. Without his makeup and Alice controllers and all that black, he was devilishly handsome. Its not like I was attracted to him, but it was a nice observation.

"Goodnight, Alice." he says.

I let a single tear slip unnoticed down my cheek.

"Goodnight." I say.

Sleep comes not to long after.

…

**Sorry for making you wait. Thanks so much for reading! Feel free to tell me what you think and make suggestions! I always love to hear what you have to say and I usually take into consideration and put it in the story! Ill update soon!**


	10. Chapter 10-Narumi's Observations

Mikan's P.O.V

Everyone has a moment in life, where they just wish time would freeze. In my lifetime, I hadn't had many of those. With my parents not their, and my grandfather dying right after I came here, my childhood was cut short. But my dreams made up for them. Though rare, they were wonderful and cherished.

When I woke up, it wasn't one of those moments.

My eyes slowly opened, and I was met with the peaceful sleeping face of Persona. Without all that stress, and makeup, and without that literal AND figural mask on, he was much more handsome. His hair, instead of being perfectly spiked, was tousled and flat from where he slept on it. I'd never noticed his eyelashes were so long. His skin was pale, but it had a glow to it that make up covered. Shockingly enough, his lips, though thin, were full and looked soft. All in all, he was beautiful.

As I stared at him, its almost like reality hit.

Murderer. Life was completely different. There was no going back. I was a slave to my own nature.

Tears welled up in my eyes.

"Rei," I whimper, curling up in a tight ball. His black eyes slowly open, and he pulls me close to him.

"Don't cry, don't cry," he says, his voice somewhat sad.

"I don't want to die inside, im scared, so scared." I whimper, shaking my head back and forth.

"Everything will be okay, alright? I wont let anything hurt you," he murmurs.

"You cant protect me from myself," I say.

He tilted my head up and made me look him in the eyes.

"Watch me," he said. I just cried. I cried until I felt like every tear that I ever had to cry was gone. I cried until I wasn't scared anymore. I cried because I deserved that. After what iv been through, and what iv done, I deserve a good cry.

Rei had to go, and he got his things and left me to myself, I sat down, mindlessly watching TV for awhile, until I heard a person enter my room. I didn't even bothering looking up, knowing that there were only a few people it could be.

"You okay?" Aki asked me from behind.

I look up at him and nod. He pats my head and sits down next to me.

"You watch football?" he asked, chuckling lightly. I nod, engrossed in the game. We both watched, not a word spoken, until a commercial break..

"Is Persona your boyfriend?" Aki asked. I laugh lightly.

"What would make you think that?" I ask, my voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Just answer, don't be a bitch," he growls, making me laugh lightly.

"No. He loves me, but I don't really feel the same way. No, not towards him," I say, more to myself then to him.

"Towards him? If not him, then who?" he asked.

I close my eyes.

"No one that you know. No one at all actually. I don't like him. He is bad," I growl quietly.

"Your not really talking to me, are you? Sounds like its more to yourself," he said.

I just shrug.

"Yeah, maybe so, but that is irrelevant. Persona likes me, and he grounds my sanity, so its good for us both," I say.

Then the game comes back on, and we go back to our comfortable silence.

…

Narumi's P.O.V

I watched my class as it changed. If you didn't look really hard, you wouldn't really notice, but I had been with this class since elementary. I knew my students way better then they thought.

Natsume's change was probably most evident. You could see it in his eyes. The agony, the pain, the regret. He was more of a shell of a person. No longer did he have the energy to care. He was constantly reckless and did things on impulse. He didn't care for anyone and especially not for himself.

Hotaru was more wary. She didn't talk as much, well, less then usual, and she was violent. I would like to meet one person who hadn't been victim of infamous Baka Gun. She lived in a state of constant regret for what she had said and done.

Ruka was influence a lot by Hotaru and Natsume's moods. That meant he didn't have good influences around him. He wasn't really bunny boy anymore, he realized that he got more respect if he used his Alice on more…manly..creatures. Lion and tigers and bears OH MY! I don't know how many teachers he had threatened with his animals.

The whole classes atmostspere was heavier. Class wasn't as giggly and fun as it used to be. I honestly didn't like it.

I had been walking down the hallway, heading towards the principles office, when I saw Natsume fighting with an upperclassman. I yanked them apart.

"You. Go. NOW." I threaten. The boy nods and scampers off.

I turn to Natsume and slap him across the face.

"Wake up. She is gone, deal with it. Ruining yourself wont help anything." I spit at him, for the first time in a long time, angry.

"You don't get it," he spits.

"I don't get it. I DON'T GET IT. All I get is ALL you do is MOPE." I yell.

"I LOST THE GIRL I LOVE, NARUMI. I WAS STUPID AND SHE LEFT. YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY?" he yells, his face contorting in agony.

"Because I was too stupid to admit that I was in love with her," he whispers, looking at me with his crimson eyes.

"She will come back," I say.

"You don't know that," he says bitterly. I clap my hand on his shoulder.

"Call it fathers intuition. I know," I say. He gives me an odd look, and walks off towards the nurses office.

"Oh, Mikan, this place is far to different without you. Its not a pleasant different either. Please, just come home," I say, looking at the cloudless sky.

She needed to come home. Because this place wasn't the same without her. It wasn't home.

She was the sun in our life, with a smile that gave you warmth, and right now its winter. But the best thing about winter is the spring that eventually has to roll around.

…

**Hey there! Thanks for reading! Drop me a review! Thanks!**


	11. Chapter 11-To Live Or Not To Live

Mikan's P.O.V

It was weird. Everything was weird. I was feeling feelings that, to be honest, were terrifying me.

Why would I be terrified of my own feeling, you ask?

Because they are aimed at a person I never thought I could like, let alone love.

They were aimed at Persona.

I don't know why they were, I guess its just that for once in my life someone was treating me with CARE instead of insulting me like Natsume was. Maybe it was just because I wanted to love someone just so I could be loved back. Or maybe, it was because I was MEANT to love him, instead of Natsume.

I had no idea and I was scared to find out.

"Alice! Mission. Be out it 5," yells Aki into my room.

"Fine!" I yell as I get out of the comfort of my bed.

I get dressed in my 'mission clothes' and head out to the living room where they are waiting for me.

"Ready?" Aki asks, and I just roll my eyes and head towards the door.

"Have to be such a bitch?" asks Seb and I snarl at him. I have become fairly cut throat over the last few days. Lack of sleep and just flat out unhappiness are making me, and everyone around me, absolutely miserable.

Lets just get this over with.

Right before I open the door, it is opened for me, and I jump back to avoid it.

"I know im keeping you, but I just wanted to, DROP by and give you a pleasant little surprise!" the principle yelled as he grinned wickedly at us.

"What do you need, principle?" asks Aki through clenched teeth.

"You don't need to go on this mission!" he says cheerfully. Everyone sighs happily, but I keep my posture rigid.

"Well, the mission still has to be done, but it will be done by Mikan. Alone." he says, a dark, evil look in his eyes.

I can sense all the words that want to roll of their tongues, but they are biting back.

"Is that all?" I ask. He nods his head.

"Well, I only have so much time, so I guess I will take my leave." I say, and he moves out of the way so I can walk through.

I leave the academy silently, and say my goodbye.

I mean, this is the way they kill their assassins.

…

Aki's P.O.V

I wanted to scream and grab her, making her stay here. I knew what he was planning and I knew that Alice was probably going to die. But I couldn't. I had family that the principle would kill without a glance. I couldn't just give up their lives because I didn't want to be alone while I was away from them.

That is how much humanity is sacrificed in this place.

"Isn't it nice of me to sacrifice her instead of any of you? Aren't I just a wonderful, nice person?" he asks. The pure disgust that I knew was sitting in our stomach was barely keeping itself at bay. We all wanted to jump across the room and strangle him until we could feel his life leaving his body.

But we wouldn't.

We couldn't.

As much as we wanted to.

"I said, isn't it nice of me?" he asks again, venom dripping from his voice.

"Yes, principle, so nice of you," says Chess, saving all of our asses.

"Good, now im going to leave. Enjoy your wait to see if our dear, dear Alice is still alive." he says, as he leaves the room.

"One day, ill kill him!" yells Sebastian, anger rolling off him in waves.

"Go calm yourself down." I say and he stomps out of the room. "You should go rest too, your condition will kill you if you don't rest enough." I whisper to Chess.

She nods and leaves.

I sit down on the couch with my head in my knees.

What kind of monsters have we developed ourselves into?

…

Seb's P.O.V

I walk into my room completely calm. I had faked angry to make sure I wasn't interrupted while I was writing. Yes, I said, writing. Who was I writing too? Natsume Hyuuga.

When I was first kidnapped because of my Alice, they took me to Gakuen Alice. I was place in a DA and there I met Natsume. When I left, we stayed in contact. He told me about this girl that he was secretly in love with. He sent me a picture, and I immediately recognized Alice as Mikan.

So it was finally time to tell him, especially if she might not be making it back alive.

'_Hey Natsume. _

_I know that I haven't written you in a while, and you know its not without good reason. it's a very good reason I assure you. We were all training a new member to our team. She is a very pretty girl, and im sure you would just love her._

_Actually, I know that you do._

_Its Mikan, Natsume._

_She is powerful, and she is bitter. Her and Persona are in some type of relationship. She isn't like you described her at all. She is just full of Hate, Natsume. You would not like her at all._

_I just figured I would tell you where she is even though she was just sent on a mission that might possiblely cost her, her life._

_I am so sorry Natsume. I couldn't stop her. I have people that are depending on me. But she is a strong girl. I believe in her abilities. She is one of the best of the best. She wouldn't be here if she wasn't. _

_About three days after you get this letter, I will tell you how she is. It will be short and sweet. Sorry you have to wait but I believe that you would have preferred for me to tell you._

_Your friend,_

_Seb_

I looked down at the paper, and nodded. I put it in its envelope. Ill have to pay one of the kids to transport it out of here.

Oh well.

I close my eyes and pray. Just pray. Pray for Alice. Pray for Mikan. And pray for Natsume.

Because im not really sure who needs it most.

…

Principle's P.O.V

You want to know what is fun? Taunting three teenagers that you know want nothing more then to kill you. Yet knowing that they wont touch a hair on your head. I knew something they didn't knowwwwww.

Alice was going to live.

I knew that for a fact. I had told Persona what I had done right after I sent her on the mission and he was going to go save her. Not that I knew if he was going to make it in time.

All I knew was that she was either going to survive off her own raw power to live, or Persona was going to freak and save her from any danger.

He was a very possessive man.

Either way, I win. She dies. I win. She lives. I still win

It's a vicious, yet delightful cycle.

…

**Sorry for the wait. I AM IN DIRE NEED OF INSPIRATION. THANKS FOR READING. TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK.**


	12. Chapter 12-Bye, Bye Academy

Principle's P.O.V

I'm basking in the excitement of the game 'Is Alice Alive or Not?' when I get interrupted by the phone ringing.

"Hello?" I ask in a normal, professional tone.

"Hello, this is the Principle of Gakuen Alice."

"Oh, what is the lovely occasion that would make you call?" I ask.

"Your request got sent through. Its been decided that having a school run by delinquents, full of delinquents that want to rebel is just to…risky. Though I strongly disagree on this decision, I have been told that I have to inform you that you have permission to do what you like. Go ahead, go kill all the kids that you deem necessary you sick bastard." he spits.

"Oh, if you knew what it was like, you would say the same thing. These kids have no will to live. Besides, it doesn't really even matter, because I know that some will live. Most of them will, actually. They are sly buggers and will do anything to survive. Really, its just kind of like a game. A scavenger hunt of sorts. I scatter them, and they then try to find them." I sing back happily.

"Whatever. Just send the ones you promised to Gakuen Alice and I hope you die before you can kill those kids." he says. I just laugh and he hangs up. Finally, I was getting my wish. Years ago, I had said that the academy was getting to trouble some and half the kids were so crazy all they did was kill. The rest weren't necessary. I had helicopters waiting for evacuation. I would take the ones that were worth something and send them to an academy.

The deal was that I had to take all of my 'gems' to Gakuen Alice.

And I couldn't go with them.

At first, I wanted to lie and send others, but they seemed to think of that and did some research, finding the ones that were the best. My poor little plans were foiled.

I walk to where my 'Gems' stay and barge in for the second time today. I see Aki's eyes turn from the TV to me, and he glares daggers at me.

"You have an hour to gather everything that you need before this whole island is destroyed. Have fun." I say, and I walk out. He gets up and immediately goes to work.

I go back to my office, gathering up my 'important' things, and putting them into my briefcase. Wherever I was going, I could get more clothes, its not that big of a deal. I like to pack lightly. I go over to the microphone that was connected to intercom and push the worn, black button.

"Hello, you ungrateful little shits. I am sick of all of you and have gotten permission to blow this hell hole up. I know, your all pretty happy right now. But im going to leave on a helicopter with those of you that are still useful and im leaving the rest of you to your own devices. Have fun! Bye bye!" I say, turning it off.

I can practically hear there screams of anger. Oh, wait, I CAN hear there screams of anger. Let me tell you its like music to my ears.

With a smile on my face I walk up the stair, leading to the room where my personalized helicopter is waiting to whisk me away for a all expense paid vacation. It so tiring being as wonderful as I am that I think I deserve a break.

I take one final glance at the academy below and smile and wave.

Good bye forever, Hell.

Natsume's P.O.V

I sat in class, trying to catch some sleep, when Narumi walked into class. For the last week he had just given us free period, not even bothering to come in and tell us, just writing it in his curly handwriting on the black board. But, I guess today he would be teaching.

"Today's lesson is a little bit different. Due to the current attacks on the academy, higher authorities have decided that we need some protection. We have sent for some specially trained Alice's to come and help with security. These are the best of the best and we figured that you needed to learn a little bit about them." he says. Narumi looks completely uncomfortable.

This had grabbed my attention.

If it made Narumi squirmy, then it HAD to be good.

He puts a disk into the projector and immediately lights up.

"The worst academy, well, the academy that hold the most dangerous Alice's in the world is in a secret location that very few people know. The students don't even know where they are. If you are a student there, then you are in one of four groups-" he starts.

"Well, duh, all of us are." says someone in the back.

"It different. The groups are Liars, Assassins, Leaders, or Servants.

Liar are the ones that don't really stay on the island very much. They are the ones that downplay their Alice's and work from the inside of lots of different academies or organizations to keep things in order or to get money from them.

Then there are the Assassins. They are the ones that kill people. Its kind of like they do all the dirty work. Truth be told that category is filled with trigger happy psycho's and sadists. You want to stay away from them.

The Leaders are very important. They are the ones that usually take high places in the different academies or in all the companies we own. They are the ones that are made to tell others what to do. Practically all of them are egotistical, narcissists that care about nothing but self image and building themselves up in any way possible. They are quite a strong bunch.

The Servants are the ones that still have strong Alice's, but not as strong as some of the others. They serve all of the other categories. Pretty much all they do is the slave work no one else want to do. They are useful in a lot of ways, though. They can do undercover work. Some of their Alice's are very specialized. They will go and pretend to underdogs to get information. So they aren't completely, so say, useless." says Narumi.

"And what if you don't fit into one of those categories?" I ask. Everyone's head turns toward me, shocked that I would even talk.

"There is one more category. One that is extremely rare. Its called The Freak Shows. These are the most powerful Alice's in the whole world. These are the ones that cause natural catastrophes, outbreaks, and plagues. These are the ones that will be guarding out school. There are 5 members in that group and you will get to know each one." says Narumi, clicking the button on the remote.

It showed a boy, looking up lazily as he sits on the couch.

"This is Aki. He is the strongest male Alice user in the world. Unlike Persona's Alice, his is immediate. His Alice is Death." says Narumi. All the girls in the room sigh dreamily. He had shaggy red, and yellow eyes. What the heck? He was just weird looking.

"Then there is Sebastian. He is the second strongest male Alice user in the world. His Alice is Animal Transformation." says Narumi. Now that was a familiar face. I knew that he was at one of the higher security schools, but I never knew he was up that high. I stare out the window, thinking that I would have to write him later to tell him.

Then I saw a Raven in the widow, holding a letter. It flies in, landing on Ruka's shoulder and dropping the letter on my lap before flying away. And it seems like no one noticed.

I open up the letter, still listening to Narumi.

"This lovely lady is Chess. She is the second strongest female Alice user in the world. Her Alice is Advanced Mind Reading." he says. She was truly a dark beauty.

I start reading the letter and my mind starts to pulse a thousand times a minute. Oh, no. Mikan had been transferred to THAT academy. She might be dead. The girl that I RUINED might be dead. I drop the letter to the floor, not even caring what he had to say anymore. It didn't matter.

Mikan might be dead.

And Seb said that she wasn't anything like how I had described her. She was dark and bitter and full of hate. That wasn't how I knew Mikan. That wasn't the girl I fell in love with.

I didn't want her to change and I didn't want her to be dead.

Right in the middle of class, I snatch the letter off the floor and walk out of the room before Narumi could start another person.

I run towards the garden, and go and sit by the lake. I fall back, despair reigning down on me like a whirlwind. My heart hurt.

I was just sick and tired of all of this.

'Then go to sleep….go to sleep, Natsume, go to sleep,' a soothing voice said. I shook my head, but the unfamiliar voice keep insisting, and somehow, I found it hard to say no.

I close my eyes, and within seconds, im asleep.

…

Seb's P.O.V

Aki had barged into my room just as I was sealing the top of the envelope to the letter.

"The principle is blowing up the academy, lets go. Get your crap, we have an hour." he says, before leaving. Immediately, I set to it, getting all of my valuables and stashing them into a bag. When im done, the room is completely empty and I have plenty of time to spare.

I go into Alice's room and get all her stuff together. If she lives, she will want it, but if she dies, Natsume will want it.

Either way, its wanted.

After im done with her stuff, I meet them in the living room as they strip that room clean too. We leave a completely empty apartment and head to the landing pad in the forest where we leave from every time we go places. We board the helicopter, with time to spare and fly into the air, knowing that will be the last time we ever see it.

We will remember it in all its haunting glory.

I sit in my seat, leaning back, before I remember that I didn't send that letter to Natsume.

"Shit!" I mutter under my breath as I bustle around, opening the door and whistling. My Raven comes, flying side by side with the helicopter. How, I don't know, but its doing it anyway. I give it the message and tell it where to go, and somehow, it always seems to get there. I had only used it at the academy, but now I would see if it worked everywhere else.

It flies off and I sit in my seat again.

"This is going to be weird," says Chess.

"But cool," says Rezabella.

"All I want to know is how Alice will find us if we aren't there," says Aki.

"She is a smart girl. And she is like a boomerang. She always finds her way back home." I say.

And I hope that its true.

..

**Its been a long time, I know, but I hit a brick wall. Im still there. Thanks for waiting and reading! Ill try to update soon! Feel free to LEAVE ME IDEAS and tell me what you think! Thanks for reading!**


	13. Chapter 13-Back To The Garden

THE LONG AWAITED..

Mikan's P.O.V

I fought with everything in me. The guards just kept coming! They wouldn't stop! I had cuts and wounds all over me, and I knew that in just a little bit, I would be to weak to fight.

The principle would get his wish.

I was going to die.

I felt someone hit me from behind and I clutched the beloved chip close to my chest. I was going to die getting this, so I was going to make sure they pried it out of my cold, dead hands.

"HOW DARE YOU!?" I hear a familiar voice roar, and its as if the whole entire room froze.

Through my black splotched vision, I saw the familiar outline of Persona. That sure as hell was his voice.

Within a minute, every one of them was dead from his deadly Alice. He strides over to me, scooping me up with a small smile on his face.

"I made it just in time. For a while there, I thought I was going to lose you." he says softly.

"I don't love you." I say. I don't really know why I said it. I guess it was just the fact that I felt so dead inside. That I had finally realized that no matter what anybody did it was all useless.

It was all in vain.

I was a just a puppet at this point.

"I know. You think I ever doubted that, silly girl. Just because you are mine doesn't mean that I am yours. But I can dream. In my head, I will always be yours and you will forever be mine," he says.

I want to say that I saw tears shimmering in his eyes. That I saw a flash of sorrow flash through his eyes. But I didn't. he didn't show any remorse or any inkling of emotion.

"Lets get you fixed up," he saws, lifting me up and carrying me out of the building that I was so sure I was going to die in. I merely clutched onto his shirt, letting myself drift off into dreams of time when life wasn't so hard and staying in a state of blissful ignorance.

…

When I woke up, It was because I felt a needle prick me, and Persona was hovering over me, his usual blank expression on his face. He was fixing me up, tending my wounds and helping my healing process go faster.

"When will I be returning to the academy?" I ask, turning to the side to give him better access.

His hands ceased in their movement.

"You mean they didn't tell you?" he asked.

"Tell me what?" I say, looking over my shoulder. I didn't like it when I had things kept from me.

"They blew up the school. They sent the really important people to different academies." he says nonchalantly.

For awhile, im completely silent. Im not going back to that steal and concrete prison that I had known for so long.

Maybe I was going to a place where I could get a tiny little taste of the normalcy that I used to know.

"Your team was sent to Gakuen Alice." he says.

Every muscle in my body tenses.

"Why in the hell would they need my team there?!" I say angrily.

"Recent attacks on the school. They need to make sure the students are safe. You know, since they don't want their students to die like our academy did." he says casually.

I shake my head, dread filling me from head to toe. I don't want to go back there. I want to stay as far as humanly possible from that place.

"I know that you don't want to go back there, but you don't have a choice. I don't either. I have to go back to teaching those awful little brats. You have to go back to having to deal with those annoying twits you used to call your friends. But we do get to go back to the garden again." he says.

Back to the garden… hm. Maybe I might have to deal with those awful people who ruined me. Maybe I would have to guard what I most hated. But I would get to go back to the place that I was drawn to. The garden that called for me.

"Alright. Lets go," I say.

….

Narumi's P.O.V

After Natsume stormed out of the room, I stopped the lesson. He needed to know about this. It was important.

"Free period for the rest of the hour. Could someone go get Natsume and tell him that he needs to be in class tomorrow. This is very important." I say dully, and I see Ruka nod his head. I exit the classroom and head for the dormitory.

I go to the attic, one of the smallest rooms there is in the building and sit on the bed. The room seemed practically empty, but you could tell.

Even though time had passed, you could most definitely tell that once upon a time, someone lived here. There were still scuff marks from where she would trip. The curtains that she picked out where still hanging in the window. I sat on her bed, and when my weight settled, I heard a small thud from under the bed. I looked under there and saw a book.

My eyes widened slightly.

It wasn't just any book, it was a diary.

It wasn't just any diary, it was Mikan's diary.

I open it, laying back in her bed and reading it. She poured her heart out about how sad she was, who she loved, how people treated her and the things that hurt her. Tears silently slipped down my cheeks at knowing that I was oblivious to all of this. I was to blind to really see. It was all just an act.

I read the remains of the diary, and rested it on my chest. My eyes closed, and I let myself fall into the place where I was with Mikan and she was happy, healthy, and I could always protect her.

…

Natsume's P.O.V

'_Do you miss her, Natsume?' a eerie voice asked._

'_Of course I do! I would do anything to get her back,' I say, angry that anyone would doubt that for a moment._

'_You will get her back, Natsume, she I coming back to the garden. Back to you.' the voice said._

'_Who are you? How do you know?' I ask._

'_The garden, Natsume, she will always come back to the garden,' it says, then you hear a soft laugh._

'_What about me? Will she ever forgive me?' I ask, knowing the voice is getting farther and farther away._

'_Maybe, maybe not, you'll have prove that you can be the man she needs. Or she will turn out, Just. Like. Me.' it said, before the darkness faded and the light came back._

I woke up with a start, my eyes scanning my surroundings. I let out a shaky breath and ran my hands through my hair.

Everything was just getting so confusing and I didn't like it.

"Natsume! Natsume!" I heard Ruka yell from quite a distance.

I quietly go through the forest, wanting to make sure that Ruka doesn't get to close to garden. I find him by the Sakura tree, and I made my way over to him.

"What?" I ask quietly.

"Go to class tomorrow. Narumi needs to teach us about those people and he thinks you need to know."

"Whatever," I mumble. I just need time to think. Ruka walks away and I sit down.

Why is everything getting so confusing so quickly?

…

**Thanks for reading, feel free to tell me what you think!**


	14. Chapter 14-Through The Telescope

Seb's P.O.V

The limo pulled up through the gates of Gakuen Alice and I saw the building that I hadn't seen in so long. Chess and Rezabella where pressed up against the glass, eating up the sight of there new found form of 'freedom' in slavery. Aki just stared at the building blankly, not really doing anything. Either he was in some serious denial, or he wasn't pretending to not care, he really just didn't give a shit.

When we the car came to a halt, we all stepped out, and I looked up at the sky, so filled with color as the sun set against the skyline of the academy. It looked just like something that happened right as '_**And they lived happily ever after,**_' was written across the screen.

But in this story, there was no happy ending in sight.

"Hello, my name is Tono, Narumi was supposed to pick you up but he seemed to have disappeared." a man with long hair said. His voice was light, but you could tell that he wasn't happy about this 'Narumi' guys skipping out on picking us up.

"I'll show you your rooms." he says. He leads us to the building, chatting light heartedly along the way about the history and the groups and all the bullshit that I could care less about.

We are heading down a corridor where all the special star dorms are, when I see a familiar face.

"Natsume?" I ask, and his eyes snap towards me.

"Seb?" he asks, his forehead scrunching together. My team looks from him to me, wondering what the relationship between us could be. I mean, friends that were anywhere outside the academy where rare, practically unheard of. People with Alice's as strong as ours usually just disappeared one day, and where never heard of again.

"We got here a little bit early… how have you been holding up?" I ask him.

"Where is she?" he asks, his voice nearly laced with desperation.

I just shake my head.

In his eyes, I can practically see his heart shatter. His eyes get this dead look, and his fists clench together so tightly that you can see a drop of blood come out.

"Give her one more day, Natsume, then we will know for sure." I say. He simply nods his head and goes into the dorm on his right.

Its completely silent for awhile, before Tono finally breaks it.

"Well, this is your dorm room. Boys will be in this room, girls in the one next to it. Its connected by a door. I hope you will be comfortable. Welcome to Gakuen Alice." he says happily. We step into the boys side of the dorms and all sit down on the big, black couch.

"What the hell was that about?" asks Aki, as he casually flips through the channels.

"I met Natsume when I was here for awhile before I was shipped to Hell. We stayed in touch through letters." I say. "He told me about a girl that he was in love with, but he told me she was transferred away. I didn't think anything of it. That is until I realized that it was Alice. He was in love with Alice." I finish.

All there eyes were on glued to me.

"There is no way. Alice is a cold, heartless, ruthless killer. I doubt she would even be able to fall in love. And im not saying this to be mean, im just saying from what I've know of her, she has always been cruel. Do you think that she was really that different?" Rezabella asked.

"Did you always used to go on nightly missions and kill people? Did you always Hate living? Did you always know how to kill a person with any object in at least 7 different ways? I didn't think so. Its not that hard to believe. She was a regular before she was ruined." Aki says. He was right.

None of us used to be like this.

"Why did you say that we should wait just one more day?" asks Chess.

I sighed. "Im not really sure. I just have this weird feeling that she isn't dead. Maybe tomorrow will come and she still wont return. Maybe in this very second, she is dead. I don't know. We will have to wait until tomorrow," I say. Everyone nods wearily and we all part ways.

That night, I lay in bed, thinking of all the things that had happened over the past few days. We were out of Hell, into Gakuen Alice, and now we were just praying that Alice would come back.

But there is always a possibility she wont.

It was the not knowing part that was the worse.

"Come on, Alice, he is waiting for you. Just get yourself home," I whisper, sighing, before sleep overtakes me.

…

Narumi's P.O.V

I wake up in Mikan's room, her diary perched open on my chest. I take out my phone and check the time. Time to get ready for class, or im going to be late.

After going back to my room, I resist the urge to fall back in my bed and sleep for the next ten years, and get ready. As I walk into the classroom that already has students chattering happily, I sit at my desk and wait for the familiar ring of the bell.

"Hello, students, we are going to have to finish what we had started yesterday. I believe that we were at the lovely Chess when we stopped." I say.

"Thank you," I hear a voice say as the door opened. In walks four beautiful people, two boys and two girls.

"Who are you?" I ask.

"Well, im Chess, the one you complimented. This is Aki. That's Rezabella. He's Seb. We are here for security reasons." says Chess smoothly.

"Right. I thought there was supposed to be one more of you." I say. I see all there faces fall just a little, the atmosphere becoming a little darker.

"She is running late." says Aki shortly.

"Alright, would you like to take over from here. We went over all of you but Rezabella and Alice." I say.

"Well, Rezzy can do her own introduction and then we can give you a little more insight on ourselves." says Seb. I nod my head.

"My name is Rezabella. I am the 3rd strongest female Alice user in the world. My Alice is Distortion." says Rezzy.

"Its nice to see you all here, and thanks for coming. Now, what is Alice like?" I ask.

"Alice is probably one of the most bad-ass bitch you will ever meet." says Rezzy.

"She is the silent, terrifying type. Nothing stops from getting what she wants. She will always fight for what she wants." says Chess.

"Even if it means that she pries it out of your cold, dead hands. She will do it without the blink of an eye. And she will wake you from your eternal slumber if you got any blood on it." says Seb.

"In short terms, you mess with her, you don't live to see the light of day," Finishes Aki.

"She sounds terrifying." someone says.

"Oh, she is," says Rezzy.

But the still had a look in there eyes. You could tell that no matter how harsh the comments were, they weren't meant to insult her. They were simply telling her 'best' qualities.

They really did love her.

…

The day passed by slowly, and I was standing on the roof with all my students. The sky was dark and completely clear of clouds, just showing the bright, twinkling stars. I was teaching the Astronomy class as a substitute because the teacher was on 'vacation' off campus.

Everyone had there own telescope pointed at the sky, adjusting it as it was needed while I fiddled with mine. Just one more minor adjustment….

Good.

I look through the scope that was pointed on the ground below and put the lens into focus. A blurry object soon became a blurry figure. The blurry figure soon became a person, laying on the ground. The person because a girl, and the girl became so much more familiar.

She had chestnut brown hair that was only to her chin. Her dress was torn and bloody. She was just laying on the ground, her eyes focused on the moon shining brightly above.

It couldn't be.

No….

The more I looked at her, the more I knew. I knew exactly who that was.

I ran to the edge of the roof, leaning down over the railing, and looked down.

"M-I-K-A-N!"

….

**SO SORRY FOR THE WAIT, I HAVE BEEN SO BUSY! I HOPE YOU LIKE IT AND FEEL FREE TO TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK! THANKS FOR READING!**


	15. Chapter 15-What Have You Become?

Mikan's P.O.V

Persona and I transported back to the academy, right in front of the famous wrought iron gate. I felt an unfamiliar feeling of excitement well up in the pit of my stomach. I couldn't wait to be back in there. Persona got a bright glint in his eyes, and he flashed me a small, almost completely unnoticeable smile. He took out a black, skeleton key and unlocked the gate, saving us both from the trouble of climbing over it.

The gate swung open without as much as a creak. We both walked inside, a feeling of calmness overcoming us both.

Persona walked peacefully through the garden and I left him to his own thoughts. I walked over by the lake and threw off my muddied combat boots and my soiled socks, and stuck my feet in the blissfully cool water. It soothed my aching feet, making a sigh of contentment escape my lips.

This was heaven.

"I have to leave," says the booming voice of Persona from behind me. I barely even nod. For a while, I know that he is staring at me, and then he turns around and heads toward the exit.

I sit there for quite some time. I lie on my side, facing the shore and watch the waves lap against the beach. There should be fish swimming around, and birds chirping in the trees, but there are none. You are greeted by nothing but an eerie silence that is thick in the air.

For quite some time, I just lay there. I lay there thinking of the last time I was here. It seems…so long ago… I was just a weak girl. I had long, chestnut hair that stopped at the small of my back. My eyes, though they were sometimes filled with sorrow, had joy in them, making the brown look like the color of melted chocolate and the golden specks look like sunshine.

I had never thought of myself as ugly, but I wasn't a beauty queen. At least, I didn't think so.

Now, I was a hard, cold-hearted bitch. My happiness was sucked away from me, leaving me with an empty heart. My hair was still chestnut colored, but it was short. My eyes were dead, making them look more like mud then anything and the golden specks looked more like pee. I was all pierced and tattooed. I was strong, but any ounce of beauty I had held was long gone. Gone and dead.

I blinked, hoping to focus on whats in front of me instead of all the withering thoughts that fill my head.

I get off the ground, dusting myself on in vain. Maybe I wouldn't have dirt on me, but it's not as if I could get any of the ground in bloodstains out. For a while, I just walked around the garden, looking at the flowers. They were so odd…so very odd… beautiful but odd.

And it amazed me. Something so beautiful, so idenpendent, with such a raw power to live, was so very delicate. It would push its roots into the core of the very earth, yet with a simple clench of the fist, it would be gone.

It just amazed me.

I plucked one of the roses up in my hand and walked out of the garden. The sky was dark and the forest casted shadows, making me lose my way. Finally, I reached a familiar sight. A sight that made my heart drop. Her branches swayed lightly, and her blossoms fell to the ground, covering the ground with a natural carpet of sweetness.

It had been so long since I had seen it, that I couldn't help but reach my hand out and touch the dark bark of the tree. It felt almost cool, the bark so familiar to me. My slow steps took me to the front of the tree, where the branches judded out, making it the perfet place to come for shade when it's hot out.

I couldn't even think of how many afternoons Natsume and I had wasted away with him asleep on my lap.

My fingers came to a sudden creavess that was smooth inside. There was no way that it could be natural. It was human made. Slowly, I look closely, and what I see makes me stumble back.

Natsume had carved our anitials into the bark.

Unable to look at it, I turned the other direction. He had the nerve…. It just made me sick to my stomach thinking about it.

I walked around the all to familiar school that was so deathly silent that I would have swore it was abandon if I hadn't known better. The way the moon hit the castle like buildings was beautiful, almost unearthly. I wanted to be just like it.

I lay down on the ground, and stared up at the shining moon, the stars reflecting in my eyes. All I wanted was for this moment to freeze, so I could lay here forever, basking in the wonder.

I was too lost in my thoughts to hear the faint murmur of voices not to far off, but I sure as hell did hear when my name, the name that I hadn't heard in such a long time that I barely recognized it.

"M-I-K-A-N!" I heard a scream. I looked up to see the astonished face of Narumi. I sat up, turning to face him with my head held high.

I could see his eyes shimmering with tears, and if I didn't know better, I would think that the pain behind my eyes was tears pricking them, but they couldn't possibly be.

He turned his back to me, an ran towards the staircase that would lead him down. I stood up, walking towards the entrance and going up the stairs. I was about to reach the enterance, when the door flew open and I was engulfed in arms…

Arms that I had almost forgotten.

…

Narumi's P.O.V

I ran down the stairs as fast as I could, flying through hallways and finally reaching the entrance. I saw her about to open the door, but I beat her too it. I flung the door open and threw my arms around her. I held her so tight im sure it was hard to breath.

She was completely unresponsive.

Harshly, I yanked her back, wanting to see what she looked like, up close, after all this time.

What I see is dead eyes that used to be so lively. Her hair was short, making her look so much like Yuka it hurt. She was wearing a blood spattered dress, but she didn't seem to have any injuries meaning that the blood could only be some one else's. she had a thorned rose wrapped around her neck and words across her chest and a heart over her heart.

I could tell she wasn't the girl that I used to know, but I didn't know who she was.

It was Mikan alright, but the look in her eyes told me differently.

"Mikan…Mikan," I say, unable to say anything else.

"I am sorry, but I don't know who you are talking about. My name is Alice. Its nice to meet you," she says coolly, no expression passing her face.

"Mikan…what's wrong with you?" I ask.

"I am here as security for the school to protect you," she says, ignoring me.

"Mikan, this isn't funny," I say.

"If there is anything you need, feel free to ask me or my team. Have a good night," she says politely, bowing. She walks briskly away towards the dorms, leaving me standing there.

What happened to Mikan….?

…

**Thanks for reading! Feel free to tell me what you think! Im happy I got to update a little sooner then usual! Thanks again, goodbye!**


	16. Chapter 16-Fathers Lullaby

Mikan's P.O.V

After years of avoiding feeling anything, I always just assumed that if for any reason I ever did meet them again, it would be easy to walk away. Never did I expect for it to be so hard. The look on his face hurt me; the tortured look that I swore I had only seen on the children that begged to die.

Yet here he was. Wearing that very face.

I closed my cold eyes, and walked through the twisting hallways surprised that I was automatically drawn through them to the room I used to know so well. I saw the worn brown door that still had lightened wood that had spelle in decorated letters. My hand came to rest on the faded gold door knob, and slowly I twisted it, expecting it to be lock, but today seemed to be full of suprises, and it clicked open, the door swinging open.

It hadn't changed a bit.

The walls were still a pale pink and the wood was still its scuffed brown color. The bed was still in the same spot and still had the same white bedspread on it. There was the desk with the matching chair and the same lamp sitting neatly on it.

Nothing had changed at all. It was like a preserved museum only it had a thick layer of dust covering most things.

I took off my boots again, placing them neatly by the door and stripped out of my bloody clothes. I stepped into the cramped bathroom and prayed that the shower worked. Turned it on, and since luck had spit in my face all day and was trying to apologize, it worked. I let out a shuttering breath as the hot water scorched my skin and groaned.

This felt so nice.

It was washing away all the blood and dirt. All the filthy words. Everything that I tried so hard to forget every single day. Everything.

Finally, when my skin was red from heat and being rubbed raw and my hair was its natural chestnut color, I reluctantly got out and wrapped the white fully towel around me. When I walked back into my room, I realized that I had a bit of a problem.

I was clean. My clothes were not.

Sighing, I open my drawers, hoping to find something in them to wear. Empty. Empty. Empty. Empty. Bingo.

There were presents in them, of different colors and various sizes. All of them labeled TO Mikan in cursive handwriting.

I picked one up, and shook it, something bouncing around inside. Slowly, I tear it open, and it reveals a red, satin box. Slowly, I open it and it reveals a charm bracelet with matching charms.

I open the next one and its some make up. Box after box filled with thing after thing. All of them picked out by Narumi as gifts an collected in this drawer.

The last box is a square box, wrapped with sky blue wrapping paper and white ribbon. I untie it and rip the wrapping paper off. I open the box and I find something veiled in tissue paper. I pick up the black silk dress sitting in the box, and hold it against my toweled figure. It was a night-dress of silk, so long it brushed my feet. Its neck line was threaded through with a crimson ribbon and tied in the middle. It was simple and beautiful.

And perfect to wear.

I slip on the dress, loving the way it feels. Soft and comfortable, casual yet sophisticated. Perfectly fitting me.

Exhausted, I pull back the covers only to have a damn book fall of the bed. When I see the opened book that lays out before me, my eyes widen. It was the book that was practically made of my blood, sweat, and bitter tears. I had poured out my heart and that held it. That silly, leather bound book held everything that I had never had the guts to say out loud.

To say it had sentimental value would be degrading the very meaning of it.

It was priceless.

I picked up the book, and slipped under the covers, resting the open book on my chest and reading it from the beginning. How desperately optimistic and thoroughly pathetic I was! So dependent on others. Yearning so badly for love that I could never achieve. It made me sick to my stomach.

I reached the last page, the one where I was saying my goodbyes and I set the book down running both my hands through my hair. A soft draft drifted through my room, making the pages turn and I saw that in the middle of the book, someone had written a passage.

I don't think I did it. Quickly, I picked the book up and held it to my face so I could see clearly what it was. The handwriting was curvy and familiar. It was Narumi's. He had found my dairy. Read it. Even written it.

I took a deep breath and read:

_**I loved you, I cared,**_

_**I was always there, **_

_**To hold your hand,**_

_**And stroke your hair.**_

_**I was your guardian,**_

_**And you my child.**_

_**An angel like you,**_

_**To a man so mild.**_

_**I didn't think it possible,**_

_**To love you anymore.**_

_**My heart was so full,**_

_**And my love to the core.**_

_**But when you left,**_

_**That love grew.**_

_**No longer pure,**_

_**Just a motive to find you.**_

_**Im so sorry, baby,**_

_**How could I be so blind? **_

_**You were suffering so silently,**_

_**Yet you still acted kind.**_

_**I never say you weak,**_

_**Or weary or sad,**_

_**So I just figured**_

_**That you were always glad.**_

_**Every night I lay and wonder,**_

_**How I could be so naïve?**_

_**That after all this time,**_

_**I didn't know what was up your sleeve.**_

_**I feel so empty and useless,**_

_**I feel so ….unused.**_

_**Never once did I really see,**_

_**That you were being abused.**_

_**Without you life is dull,**_

_**Just not the same,**_

_**We were made to be together,**_

_**In lifes cruel game.**_

_**And now I wonder, **_

_**As vainly I cry,**_

_**If there really is a need,**_

_**For a fathers lullaby.**_

_I love you forever, my little girl._

_Love,_

_Papa._

Useless, stupid tears were threatening to pour out of my eyes as I saw for the first time in what seemed to be forever that someone actually cared.

I wanted so badly to feel hope, but I couldn't bring myself to feel it. He loved me, and I knew that, but lots of people in my life have loved me and still managed to screw me over.

My best friend. My parents. My grandfather. The list goes on. If I **hoped **I would just sow what you always get when you hope. Disappointment.

Hope is for people who live just waiting. I live a life of just doing. In the end, the result is the same.

You end up bitter and alone.

…

**I know, I know! You guys request a longer chapter then I hit a wall! I am so sorry! Thanks so much for reading! It means the world to me (as I say often). You guys are the bomb! Hope you like the chapter. I wrote the poem, just in case you wanted to know IT IS MINE! So, don't steal it or I sue you. Thanks for the support and hope you enjoy!**


	17. Chapter 17-And She's Back

Natsume's P.O.V

The room is swimming with activity. No one really knew what had happened last night and we were all so eager to find out. The night had been normal, then we heard Narumi scream out Mikan's name and sprint down the stairs. All we saw was a foot before the figure was concealed from out view. We heard murmuring voices, but in reality, the only one who knew what was being said was Koko and he refused to tell us.

His just went wide.

He covered his mouth, and shook his head before he pushed through the crowd and leaving.

Everyone stayed there for awhile, until they figured out that it was useless and went back to their rooms.

So, back to the present. We are all waiting for Narumi to come and tell us what happened.

We wait for quite some time, but still he doesn't arrive.

At this point, im pissed.

I stood up, about to leave, when our 'protectors' come in. The leader comes in; he has a ghost of a smile on his lips. Sebastian is grinning widely, his grin stretching even more when he sees me. Checkers and Isabella, or something like that, follows close behind.

When we had seen them, they had acted so seriously. But now, they seemed genuinely happy.

"The last member of our team… arrived at last." he said, his eyes flickering to the open door.

"It took her damn long enough," mutters Seb.

"This is the all famous Alice." Says Rezabella.

"Strongest female Alice user in the world." says Chess.

I had never been one to be surprised. Nothing could really faze me. More like, been there, done that, kind of thing. But never did I ever dream of the person who walked through the doors.

She walked with confidence, and she had a right to. I had never seen a girl so utterly beautiful. My eyes started at her feet. She was clad in almost knee high combat boots that made her tan, mile long legs look even longer. She was clad in tight, camouflage short and a black tank top. I say a tattoo across her chest, but I couldn't read it. Then she had another rose wrapped around her neck with thorny vines. Her chestnut hair curled around her face in a feminine way, but you could tell she was no girly girl. She wouldn't take shit from anyone.

You could tell that with one look.

Her lips where red, and oh so familiar, but they weren't turned up in a way that I was used too. Her cheeks were pale, not rosy. And her eyes.

I wanted so badly to look away. I wanted so badly to be able to see the chocolate brown eyes with golden specks. I wanted to melt into them like I used to ever time I saw them. I didn't want to see the icy orbs I stared into.

They were dead. They were lifeless. And they were everything I never wanted to see.

Her glare was cold and aimed directly at me. Her eyes pierced me to the core. I should have known. I did that to her. I made her like that.

Honestly, I should have never expected anything but bitterness.

It's what I deserved and I knew that.

"Hello. It's been to long," she says sarcastically, ripping her eyes away from mine.

Everyone just sits there dumbfounded. Mikan was gone, and they knew that. This Alice chick seemed to have stolen Mikan from us.

I open my mouth, ready to say something, but im interrupted.

"The idoit finally comes back," says Hotaru. Her eyes are hidden behind her bangs and she stands up. I can see her fists clenched tightly together. She is practically shaking at this point.

"You left like the true coward that you are. Left because you didn't want to deal with your problems and running away was easier. And after that, you even pathetically reinvented yourself, becoming something you aren't. Trying to hide the real you. You're just someone who runs away from what there scared of," says Hotaru. Her voice is quiet, but sharp.

"Says the one who caused me to leave." says Mikan nonchalantly.

Hotaru's eyes snap up.

"Can you not even take responsibility for leaving?" she spits. I have never seen Hotaru so angry. Im so used to her being emotionless that its almost scary seeing her worked up into such a rage. But under the anger in those violet eyes, I see hurt. I see loneliness. And most of all I see regret. Regret that she couldn't make her stay.

Mikan throws her head back, a cold laugh escaping her lips.

"I left because of you. I left because every day I was laughed at, put down, and treated like a slave. I could have died and you would have laughed. That is why I left." she says. Before another word can escape her lips, an alarm is heard all around the school.

Their heads snap up, "Time to have some fun, team," says the leader. Aki I think his name is.

Mikan's eyes linger on Hotaru, and flicker to mine for a few brief seconds before she turns to Aki and holds out her hands. He gives her a long look before whispering something that I couldn't hear. He hands her a shiny black gun, and before she can object, all of them are off, leaving her here.

"Damn-it all!" she yells, as she loads her gun. She glares at us; a scowl permanently fit her on her beautiful face.

While she is distracted, I stand up quietly, walking to the front of the room and putting my hands on her tiny shoulders. I turn her toward me, and look into her eyes. I do what I have longed to do forever.

I crash my lips on hers before a protest can be heard. I stare into her brown eyes while are lips are connected. They are wide with shock, the first emotion I have see cross her face besides anger since she came. Slowly, her body starts to relax, and her eyes shut a little bit.

I know that mentally she is telling herself it is wrong, and she should pull away, but right now her instincts are kicking in. The instincts to kiss back. To relax. To just let herself enjoy the moment of closeness while it lasts.

But it is abruptly broken when the door burst open. She pulls away, yanking my head into her neck and putting her arm over my shoulder. I hear a click, but I don't even realize what she is doing until I hear the controlled boom and hear something hit the floor.

The whole room is completely silent. She slowly lets me go, her arms dropping to her sides and her eyes hidden under her eyes. She walks over to the body and goes through his stuff, stealing his gun, badge, and then putting her hand on his head. There is a golden stream of light that snakes up from his head to into her ear before his body bursts into nothing.

She turns back towards us, making eye contact with Hotaru first.

"Mikan is dead. Might as well forget her. My name is Alice. I am an assassin for the worst academy in the world. Me and my team are temporarily here to protect all of you. I will leave, and I promise you something, I will never come back. You will never see me again. Might as well just act like you don't know me, because you don't know me. Im a completely different person then I used to be. Let me do my job and I will let you live your life." she says.

Then her eyes turn to me, boring holes in my head.

"Don't let that happen again," she snaps.

I smirk. Life from now on is going to be fun. I can just tell. Slowly, I open my eyes.

"Try and stop me."

…

**Thanks for reading and waiting! Feel free to tell me what you think! Thanks again! You guys are great!**


	18. Chapter 18-Does She Want To Be Fixed?

Mikan's P.O.V

I hated it. I hated him. I hated the way that he could manipulate me so easily after all the freaking training I had been through.

My body immediately reacted to him, whether I wanted it to or not.

When he kissed me…kissed me after such a long time, I couldn't think. My brain shut off and my backstabbing 'instinct' kicked in. I kissed him back.

How could I kiss him back!?

It was against everything that I had built for myself. It was against the code. Against the rules. Against the mission.

**Against everything. **

_**EVERYTHING.**_

Yet within the first **freaking **five minutes of my arrival, he had my guard down.

And every time that my guard goes down something bad happens.

I always lose something that is important to me.

And I was right.

A guard barged in, gun held in his hand ready to shoot me. Or anyone else that just so got in the range of his gun.

Without a second thought, I pull Natsume close to me, making sure that he was safe and wrapping my arm around him with the gun in hand. I shot him, making him fall to the floor dead before anyone could blink. The room was silent.

And they thought it was all just bark and no bite.

Quietly, I let go of Natsume, my arms falling to there sides. I walk over to the dead man and stare into his glazed brown orbs. He probably had a family. A wife. Kids. Maybe even a dog. I would never know. His family might mourn him, they might not. He might have been a good person, he might not of been.

There was only one way for me to know.

I put my hand on his head, and extracted his memories, the gold string going from his head to mine. I saw a beautiful girl with long golden hair and sparkling green eyes. I saw her in white on their wedding day. I saw her beautiful smiles and twinkling laughs. Then I saw him beating her until she was black and blue, and her still looking up at him with love in her eyes. She still wanted to fix him even after all that.

Yet, he still beat her until she was dead.

And she was pregnant with his kid, too.

No one deserved to die, no matter how awful they were. But to say humanity might improve a little bit wouldn't be a lie. I rob him of the rest of his earthly possessions and watch him burst into light.

Well bye, bye.

I turn back to Natsume, and lock eyes with him.

"Don't let it happen again." I say.

"Just try and stop me," he says, his eyes boring into me.

I bite my tounge to keep the reply from coming out. I wait silently as he stares at me, daring me to look his way and get myself hypnotized in his eyes. The shooting lessens, and then stops. Aki, Seb, Chess and Rezabella walk in with guns casually thrown over their shoulder.

Aki looks around.

"No one attacked, I assume," he says.

"Only one. He was low in the system. He wont be missed either." I say, just a casually.

He comes up to me and rubs my hair.

"We're going to search the perimeter, do you want to go with us?" he asks. I shake my head, wanting to go, but not letting myself.

"I have morons to watch over. Next time," I promise. They nod, and leave the room as silently as they came.

I turn around and look at the people who sit there, eyes boring into me.

Most faces are familiar, just more mature then I had last seen them, but I see a couple new faces who wonder what the hell is going on. Awkward silence is thick in the air for quite a few minutes. I didn't care, but people around the room got figity and shifty eyes, their consciences maybe finally coming into play for the first time in years.

Maybe they were realizing that they did something wrong, maybe they weren't. I didn't care either way.

"Sorry I'm so late," says a hoarse voice from the door. I look up to see a beat up Narumi with blood coming down his head and his clothes covered in dirt. His eyes display confusion and the bags under them are deep purple.

He stumbles to his desk, falling into his chair just barely.

I walk up to him and he looks at me with exhausted sorrowful eyes.

Wordlessly, I get out a first aid kit and start treating his wounds. He had the most surprised expression on his face, that I almost wanted to laugh. He looked like it was Christmas and he had gotten what he wanted but that he was also a deer in the headlights.

"Thank you," he says as I put the bandage on.

"You didn't know," I say so silently that only he could hear.

"And im so sorry for that," he says, regret lacing his voice.

I get up and glance at the class before walking out of the room.

….

Narumi's P.O.V

As she silently talked to me, I saw the first real emotion flicker through her eyes. I say concern, and I saw just a hint of love. Not love towards a spouse, or a boyfriend, but the love that a child shows to their parents.

That Mikan shows to me.

I am determined to find out what happened to her. I want to fix my little girl so she is happy. So she will smile.

So she is Mikan again.

But I had this nagging thing at the back of my head.

'_What if she doesn't want to be changed?' _it asked in an all knowing voice.

Of course she would want to be changed back into her cheery self, right? She doesn't like being so sad, so mean and so vicious…does she?

Does she like being the way she is now? Does she ever miss the times when she would just wake up and smile at the world?

Does she miss what she used to be?

The class is silent, waiting for me to speak.

"Free period, now go have some fun," I say absent mindedly.

They all start chattering about all that has happened, and scamper like little bunnies out the classroom door. I was too lost in thought to realize that a student had approached my desk. When I look up, im looking into the brown eyes of Koko.

I just give him a puzzled look.

"Do you need something?" I ask.

"She doesn't want to go back."

"What do you mean?" I ask, dread creeping up in my stomach.

"Mikan. She doesn't want to go back to how she was. She doesn't want to feel weak or vulnerable ever again. She doesn't want to be fixed in the way you want to fix her," he says.

I stare at my student with shock evident on my features.

She didn't want to be fixed? She wanted to be like that?

She didn't want to be happy?

"Maybe she wants to be happy, but you don't realize anymore how to make her happy. Maybe everyone should stop trying to be the hero and save her and let her save herself. Maybe everyone should try focusing on how she is now, and what she needs now, instead of what she used to need, and what she used to be. People change, Narumi, and she changed. Don't deny her because of it." he says in a soft voice. Then, without another word, he turns and leaves the classroom.

What would make our Mikan happy again?

At this point, is it really us that can make her happy? We hurt her once, who says we wont do it again.

We just have so much to risk and so many things to break.

I just don't want her to hurt anymore.

A voice drifted through my head, suddenly, and was gone within the next second.

'_Its pain that reminds us were still alive.'_

…

**Thanks for reading! Feel free to tell me what you think! Love you all so much! **


	19. Chapter 19- Pure Love

Persona's P.O.V

So she didn't want me. She has decided that im not good enough for her.

That I don't deserve her.

I acted nonchalant. I acted like it didn't bug me. Like it was something so simple. Nothing like it really was.

Oh, it was everything.

Did she not realize that no one would ever be able to love here more then I would? I was perfect for her. I would bend to her every wish. Pamper her every whim. Treat her like the real queen she is.

I was absolutely incapable of not loving her. It was impossible for me to hurt her.

So, why didn't she love me?

Why didn't her heart burn for me and no one else?

Why?

_Why?_

**Why?**

_**Why?**_

WHY?

_**WHY?!**_

Was my love for her nothing more then a one sided hopelessness that I will have till I die while she laughs in my face?

I slammed my fist against the great Sakura tree that sat in the middle of the garden. Its petals turned from crimson to black.

From love to Hate.

I loved Alice. Mikan. Whatever you wanted to call her. I loved that girl. She was the one I woke up to see in the morning. The one that I was willing to die for.

We could have our own Romeo and Juliet.

Our own bittersweet ending.

But I hated the way she loved Natsume. I hated the way she forgave. I hated the way that she didn't love me back. The way she looked at me most of the time. The way she got my hopes up just to tear them down and was completely oblivious about it. Or if she wasn't, she did it anyway.

I hated her.

Yet, I loved her.

I just wanted to kill her, but I wanted her to die in my arms. My love for her was _DEADLY._

'_Just like my love for Kaito,' _a voice floated through the air. I nod my head.

My love for her was just like Yuki's love for Kaito. If she couldn't have him, then no one could…

No one could…

It's perfect.

A crazy laugh burst through my lips as I leaned against the Sakura tree, its petals practically all black now.

We have a love that im willing to **kill **for.

And I would do just that.

…..

_Unknown's P.O.V_

_I loved Yuki. I loved seeing her smile. The way her eyes would dance and sparkle like the very stars in the sky when she laughed. How she seemed so open, but she had so many secrets. _

_Lots and lots of secrets._

_I always hated my Alice. I hated that it had torn me away from my mother, who couldn't even be trusted on her own. She would get drunk, get hurt, pass out in dangerous places, drown in her own vomit, or a thousand other things that would put her life at risk… _

_She needed me to take care of her and I wasn't able to do it anymore. She would have to take care of herself for the first time since my father left. _

_Anyways, I always hated my Alice until the first time that I laid eyes on Yuki. I could watch her without anyone knowing. No, I didn't stalk her; I just made sure that she wasn't getting herself into something she couldn't handle. I was like her guardian angel. I loved her from afar and was completely invisible to her._

_I knew the true extent of her powers. How dangerous it could be. What it could do if she were to get upset._

_And I secretly always hoped I would be the one that could calm her down._

_Anyways, rumor had it that Yuki liked me. She was always pleasant to me, but I never believed that she could like a nerd like me._

_I was average while she was extraordinary._

_I had neat, yet messy Silver hair, with glasses clad grey eyes. I was the unpopular class president who always got the top grades and got pushed around._

_She was the popular loner type…didn't really make any sense, but she managed to do it. _

_I could still remember her, 'Good morning, Kain-kun,' that she said to me that morning. The last good morning that she ever said to me._

_That day we had a transfer student._

_And that transfer student was the one who ruined my life and every chance I would have ever had with Yuki. He stole her heart even though he was nothing but a completely ass. Eventually, he started playing along. I mean, they were friends; he did have some amount of affection but not nearly as much as she deserved._

_Just like her, he had his secrets. Her 'best friends' loved each other. They hid it from her simply because they loved the thrill of knowing that their relationship was supposed to be forbidden._

_And because they thought that no one knew. _

_They never guessed that I did._

_They dated all through high school, while I tried to gather the courage to tell her what her 'friends' were truly like. I had been set on telling her that day. It was on my to-do it. She hated history, claiming she had 'no interest in learning about dead people,' and I knew she skipped that class practically every day._

_I had made an excuse to leave the classroom, and had gone out looking for her. If I had found her earlier, im so sure that it all could have been avoided. _

_I remember that when I peeked around the corner, her figure, dragging Kaito's was already disappearing into her playground._

_And I knew there was nothing I could do about it. I made myself invisible, and followed. We went deeper and deeper, and I don't know how many times I contemplated going back. Forgetting about this. _

_But it was time for me to stop being such a coward._

_We entered her garden, both still oblivious to my presence. She went over to the blank spot in her garden, where she would sit in front of for hours, and stood there with Kaito wrapped in her arms._

_They talked briefly, and they both lit up in light. Kaito tried to get away, but Yuki just stared down at him._

"_YUKIIIII!" I remember screaming out, and she looked at me. She saw the tears streaming down my cheeks. "DON'T DO THIS, YUKI, I LOVE YOU!" I say, my courage not failing me for the first time in my life. _

_She gave me a sad smile, and reached out her hand, dropping something on the ground, before the light got so blinding that I couldn't even look and I had to shield my eyes. The form changed, and when I was able to see, they were gone. A twisted tree was in front of me with red petals falling down, looking so innocent. _

_And like those petals, I fell to my knees. _

_The only person that I had ever loved was gone. All she wanted was love, and if I hadn't been such a coward, she would have gotten it._

_I crawled over to the thing she left for me on the ground, and saw it was jade green Alice stone._

"_Please," I begged, "Let me show you I can love you, even after death. Please," I pleaded. _

"_Please," I whispered, a lone tear falling on the stone. It glowed, but instead of the dark, mysterious glow that had engulfed, it was light, full of hope and overflowing with love. It swallowed me just as it had swallowed Kaito and Yuki. _

_In my place, there was a small rose bush that crawled up the cherry blossom tree, but never chocked it. It was like a gentle hug._

_And I finally got what I wanted. I could always be with her. No matter what. _

_There had always been mysterious surrounding their death. I had been a forgotten detail. I had the damn Alice of invisibility; they figured I just…disappeared._

_And that was alright with me. I was perfectly fine with that._

_I had been forgotten, and that was okay._

_Because my love for her was still alive, even long after I was gone._

"_**Nothing but Silver roses commemorate where I lay,**_

_**While the Earth in the skies simply fade away.**_

_**The love that was spoken to late,**_

_**Wants to heal all of your bitter Hate.**_

_**I will love and I will heal,**_

_**And show you what is pure and real.**_

_**Just you wait, wait and see,**_

_**How my love for you, will last eternity."**_

…

**Thanks for reading and sorry for the wait! I know that I won't be able to update for awhile so I hope you're happy with the tad bit longer chapter! Thanks for being so great! Enjoy!**


	20. Chapter 20-By My Hand

Mikan's P.O.V

I remember days where I used to be so happy here. Where words didn't hurt. Pushes were only playfully. And I didn't loath waking up every morning.

Those days where so far back that it's almost scary. It seemed like a different world back then.

"Times used to be so different." I hear a familiar voice say from behind me. I don't even remove my eyes from the window I was looking out.

"If they weren't different, then I would have stayed. But they changed and they became my own personal hell, so I left to find a new hell." I say, chuckling humorlessly.

"You changed." she remarked, her figure moving towards mine. She stood next to me. She had changed. Not as much as me, but she had changed.

"A little," I remark.

Her amethyst eyes looked at me in a blank way. Her stare was much like mine, but mine was harder. More empty.

"Im sorry. I shouldn't have yelled at you like that." she remarks.

"Your empty words can't hurt me anymore. Nothing can hurt me anymore." I say quietly.

"It ruined him when you left, you know."

I had been expecting some comment about Natsume and how he was after I left, but it still made my heart skip a beat.

Because it's a stupid ass heart.

I turn to look at my ex-best friend, staring into her eyes.

"And it's because of him I left. I don't care how it was for you. I don't care how you feel. I don't care. Because when I was miserable because of you, you didn't care. None of you did. So that's just a lesson learned, isn't it?" I say.

I can see the blank look in her eyes fade for a second, before her walls rebuild themselves.

"What happened to you? What have you become?" she asks silently.

I turn away from her, taking a few steps in the other direction. I glance at her over my shoulder.

"I became what I needed to be in order to survive." I say, and without another word, I walk away.

"Those are some bratty-ass son of a bitches," says Aki as I turn a corner.

"What happened to walking the perimeters?" I spit harshly.

"What happened to babysitting?" he comes back.

"I finished early," I reply.

"And I didn't want too." he says simply.

Silence fills the air as he tries to stare into my eyes. He stared like if he looked deep enough he could find something.

That well had dried up a long time ago and he knew that. He looked away, his gaze staring at the ceiling.

"So sad to actually think that we used to be like these people, isn't it? How much we've lost. What we used to have," he said, glancing at me.

"In some ways. But all of us have things we don't miss. I just think I have a lot more people that I didn't miss." I say.

"Who is Natsume to you?" he asks suddenly. My head turns towards him. That had taken me completely off guard.

What was Natsume to me? I mean, even before I left, what was he to me?

"I was very much so in love with him. He might have been a total jerk to me, but somehow, he made me fall for him. We fought, and bickered, and argued, but there were moments when it was just him and I that he restored my faith that he wasn't truly evil… the moments where we would fall asleep under the Sakura tree, or when he would do what I wanted, even if he didn't want to. And that kept me in love with him. He might make me cry, or treat me like crap, but he had me always crawling back. Pathetic, right? He got kidnapped, and I saved him. I was willing to risk my life for him. He was never my boyfriend, but he was the first guy I ever fell in love with. The first guy that I ever was willing to risk my life for." I say. I turn so I am completely facing him. "Don't I have bad judgment?"

He is staring at me, shock in his eyes.

"I just can't even imagine you happy enough to actually fall in love," he says stupidly. I don't know what it was. Maybe I was just utterly exhausted. Maybe I was just taken by surprise.

But something about that sentence made a bubble of laughter build in me.

I giggle, covering my mouth, and he doesn't notice. Then another one comes, and another one, and soon I am bent over shaking from the laughs trying to escape.

"Hey! You alright," says Aki, putting a hand on my back and trying to get a glance at my face.

That is what broke the damn.

A laugh escapes my lips and I straighten my back, letting him see that im laughing. His face gets this blank look and just stares. He stares as I laugh my cheeks hurting from being out of use for so long. When my laughing fit is over, I wipe my eyes, and look at him with a small smile in place.

"Is _that _what you used to be like?" he asks, but before I can answer, im interrupted.

"She used to be a very happy girl. Always had a big smile on her face, and her hair up in pigtails. You wouldn't even recognize her." said the eerie voice of Persona.

I just couldn't catch a break today, now could I? I wish that I could just disappear so I didn't have to worry about running into another person on the way back to my dorm.

"You would know, wouldn't you? Probably stalked her," spits Aki.

"Every now and again I would watch her sleep, but I left her alone every once in awhile," says Persona in a completely calm voice, giving Aki a charming smile.

Aki shakes his head and looks at me.

"We have a mission tonight, and we all need sleep. Get to bed as soon as possible. Try to stay as far as you can away from this freak," he says, and with one last glare at Persona, he leaves.

"Your smile could stop traffic. It was a sun," he says.

"Not anymore, so might as well get used to it," I say. He smiles at me, a smile so eerie that it made my skin break out in goose bumps. There was something so ridiculously off about that smile that it almost made me scared.

"I have a feeling that your smile will be back soon. Natsume is the one who has the ability to cheer you up, remember," he says, and with one last smirk thrown over his shoulder, he too walks away.

At this point, I was practically sprinting towards my dorm. I didn't want to see anyone. Just when the dormitory was in sight, I run into someone.

Just can't catch a frickin break, now can I? That would be to easy, right?

"Whoa, Alice, where are you going?" asks Rezzy, as she steadies herself.

"My dorm.." I say.

"Our dorms are special star," she says. I give her a short glance, and then glance at the special star dorms.

Sighing, I figure it's probably the best idea. I can run into too many people in regular dorms, I only have to try to avoid Natsume if im in Special Star.

"I have some things I need to get, then I meet you outside the building, okay?" I ask. She nods and I continue on my way. I hurry down the hallways, getting to the highest room of the building in record time. Without a second thought, I grab all the things out of the bottom drawer, throw it in a pillowcase, and haul it over my shoulders.

I stroll out of the building, looking a lot like a criminal, but I could really care less. I make it over to the Special Star dorms home free and meet Rezzy there. She shows me the room, and I fall onto my bed, exhaustion overtaking me. God today has been exhausting. I really liked not having to deal with people.

Probably because im really only used to dealing with people when I have to kill them…but whatever. I don't really care at this point.

My mind starts reeling through everything that I've been told today. There is so much.

'Sleep, Alice, you need sleep.' I tell myself. My breathing slows, and before long, im asleep.

…

I was abruptly awoken by a hard slap on my butt. Furious and ready to kill, I turn around to see the next person who is going to die, but I see Seb.

"What the hell!" I yell, pissed.

"Natsume and Aki are about to fight! You have to break it up! Neither will listen to common sense! All it takes is-" he starts, but I already know what he will say if he finishes.

It will only take a touch, and Natsume will be dead.

I sprint out, Seb following quickly in my footsteps.

If I don't make it, the man that I swore I would never give second thought to be going to die.

He couldn't die, because if that son of a bitch was going to die, I was going to be the one to do it.

…

**Sorry for the odd ending and for the wait! Thanks for waiting! It means a lot too me! Feel free to tell me what you think!**


	21. Chapter 21-Like A Dagger EDIT

Natsume's P.O.V

So many things had happened to day. My head was swimming with all the new information that was trying to process in my head.

Mikan was back, though she was a completely changed person.

She was very powerful.

She killed people, something that hurt my chest at the thought of it. The thing I had tried so hard to keep her away from was what I pushed her to do.

I had kissed her, and I knew she enjoyed it, so that must mean that there is at least a sliver of hope that she still loves me.

But that sliver must be very small, because of how she acts indicates that she hates me. Either she is pushing me away on purpose for her own reasons, or she is scared.

I know that there is no way that she can really hate me….unless she has changed more then I think. Mikan isn't capable of hate…hopefully.

Sighing, I plop on my bed. Today had been a long day, far to long for my liking. I had a feeling that I would need every ounce of sleep I could get before things got more complicated then they already were.

Just as my mind was about to succumb to the familiar lull of sleep, there was an abrupt knock on my door. I groan loudly, sitting up, I trudge slowly out of my room to the living room, but I see a familiar figure already seated on the couch. A growl escapes my lips.

"What the hell do you want?" I spit at Persona, making a smile grow on his black lips.

"Is that any way to welcome your dear teacher permanently back to the academy, Natsume? Or should I saw, Black Cat?" he says, sneering at me.

"I asked what the hell you wanted, if you expect a welcome back gift then the best you are getting is a third degree burn and me flipping you off," I growl.

He smirks. "You haven't changed one bit, I see. Still have that spark of defiance that you are so famous for. I was just going to ask you something, but if you are going to be so disrespectful, then im not sure I want to," he says, getting up.

I knew that I shouldn't ask, but my curiosity got the best of me.

"What is it?" I ask, just as his hand is going to touch the doorknob to leave.

He smirks at me over his shoulder, casually walking back over to the couch and plopping down.

"Let me ask you a few questions before I answer your question. What do you think of the new Mikan?" he asks.

I keep my usual stone-faced expression even though my anger towards him is building by the second. I clench my jaw shut and grind my teeth together.

"I have to see, I like her much more like this. She is so much more feisty now. She bites back instead of just getting all teary eyed. Teary eyed like you made her when she was here." he taunts.

I know every single one of the mind games he is playing. He is trying to get me mad, that I knew. My fury was growing with ever word that comes out of his mouth. He is winning.

"You ruined her!" I hiss.

He straight into my eyes, black and crimson locking in a deadly battle.

"No, you are mistaken. I _**tainted **_her. I showed her the true evils in the world, exposing her to violence, murder, and all the things that are kept out of view of normal people. You and your friends _**ruined **_her. I would've never gotten the chance to do that to her if you hadn't pushed her to the edge." he says, nearly making me flinch at the truth behind his words.

"I was trying to protect her."

"You couldn't protect her from yourself." he says. A thick, tension filled silence fills the room.

"You are right, I couldn't. I did lead her to her own demise, but I didn't cut the final cord of her sanity. I didn't make her into the monster. She could have recovered from the hurt I caused her. Lived a regular life. But you didn't want her too, did you? You wanted her to become a monster like you. Because you don't want to be alone." I say.

I look straight into his eyes and see that I hit just the right spot. He was practically seething. I give him a smirk and that seems like a challenge to him.

"At least I was there when she cried." he says.

"At least I didn't make her into something for my own gain," I say.

He scowls, knowing I've won. It didn't take him long for that smile to come back to his lips, like he remembered something important that he absolutely knew would get the reaction he wanted out of me.

"Well," he says, getting up and walking towards the door again. "I just came here to see if you wanted to come on a mission with Mikan and Aki. I see now that you wouldn't be interested in things like that, so I will be taking my leave now," he says.

"With who?" I ask venomously.

"Aki, the male leader of the group. Quite the charmer." Persona says.

"Where is he?" I ask.

"Ill be sure to text you the place when in find out," he says, that evil smile on his face. He knew he was starting problems and he loved it. He loved starting problems in general.

"Whatever." I say. Persona gives me one last smirk and walks out of the room.

I go back to my room and lay on my bed. Im much to fired up to sleep now. I knew I should have just let him leave instead of getting me all pissed over something I couldn't control.

I feel my phone vibrate.

_Northern woods. 7. _

Perfect. I have the time and place and now I can kick that guys ass into next week. He deserved it. Then I would take Mikan's place on the mission.

I get up and get dressed in black clothing, and I grab my back up gun from its usual place in my nightstand.

I walk out the door.

Here I come, asshole.

…

Mikan's P.O.V

I run with Seb down the stairs and out the door. It didn't take more then a few minutes to get there, and it took an even shorter amount of time to figure out where they were. They were loud and obnoxious as hell.

I see Natsume shooting fire and dodging, while Aki was charging. They didn't even seem to notice me.

I walk into the middle, where they are charging, and right before they hit me I grab their heads and slam them into the dirt.

Both groan and roll over, staring up at me.

"What the HELL are you two doing?" I hiss. Natsume stares up at me blankly, and Aki stares up at me with a pissed off expression.

"Fighting. I was taking your place on your mission." Natsume says.

"Oh get of your high-horse. You are no prince charming so stop acting like one. Its just plain stupid. I can handle myself." I snap.

Then I turn my eyes to Aki.

"YOU COULD HAVE KILLE HIM!"I yell. Aki just gives me an evil smirk.

"You would care about your lover boy, ri-" he starts before my foot is in his face.

"Don't even start. Natsume isn't the first one and you know it. You just want a nice fight because you know that you can't get one. He could be dead. You know he is actually an asset here. God you are so stupid," I say. He just glares up at me while Natsume looks up at me with pride.

I turn back to him.

"He would have killed you. Stop being stupid and rash and actually think for the first time in your life. You aren't the best at everything anymore so stop trying to act like it." I say before walking off.

Just as im walking off, I remember something.

"Oh, and you can't take my place on the mission. Don't ever try to do it again." I say, before I walk away.

I make sure I was out of sight when I fall to the ground.

I had to stop theses feelings… I couldn't be feeling it for Natsume anymore. It would get all of us killed.

The thought of him dying… what would have happened if I hadn't stepped in… I didn't even want to think about it.

It needed to stop.

It needed to stop.

I couldn't keep feeling like this.

Because if you are me, feelings get you nothing but a cold dagger in the heart.

…

**Sorry for the wait! Hope you enjoy the chapter! Tell me what you think! Thanks!**


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